The Mishaps Of Kusuo Saiki And Various Other Less Important Characters

The Best Way to Cut the Woman Down to Size Would Be to Flirt with Her Husband

The writing prompt generator didn't do me much justice, but let's make it work.

...

Aiura decided it was a good day to get herself into trouble.

I don't think it's very fair, she thought. He's my soulmate, I used my powers to confirm that! How come Teruhashi gets to spend so much time with him?

To be fair, I didn't necessarily choose to hang around Teruhashi. She followed me around today, as per usual.

Now that I think about it, Teruhashi is a little arrogant. Aiura tapped her leg and stared at Teruhashi with a cold, condescending glare. That's my thing. She needs to stop.

Now wait a minute. Let's not let this story get too unrealistic, nobody would ever think of Teruhashi that way. I just wanted to clear that up, this is the prompt's doing, not mine. Continue.

Teruhashi was perfect, as always. There's no other way to describe her. She sat at her desk, legs crossed, doing her work. Her hair laid nicely on her shoulders, her posture being perfectly straight. Her eyes shone, as did she herself. Her expression was soft and approachable, inviting even. Her internal muscular structure was nice and healthy, and her skeleton was strong. Nobody else could see this, but I can. Because I'm psychic.

On the other hand, Aiura sat not far behind her with a scowl on her face. She's also pretty, but she definitely didn't glow. Her frazzled hair bounced and knotted with every move she made. Her back hunched in a tight, anxious position, as she worried for her future with me. Her muscles and skeleton are fine. Not very remarkable.

But the fact still stands that I don't want either of them on my tail twenty-four hours a day. I have to nip this in the bud. Maybe if I could leave the room for a bit-

"Kusuoooo!" Aiura dragged her chair over next to mine. The floor screeched in agony as the legs of her chair scraped up against it. I watched as she sat down so suddenly that her poor chair almost tipped.

"Heyyy, do you wanna come over to my place today? We should totes go to that cafe you dig, that would be fun," she said, as if she didn't know I could read her mind just as easily as I listened to her. I shrugged in response.

He's always so unresponsive. How am I supposed to get him to go out with me before Miss Priss gets to him??

She seriously acts like she doesn't know me. She knows I don't want a relationship. She knows I don't like Teruhashi. She KNOWS  I can read her mind. Could she just be giving in to the ignorant, greedy nature of a human being?

I could hear Teruhashi's thoughts racing, too. It seems like she spotted Aiura.

That girl knows exactly what she's doing. Who does she think she is? I am absolutely perfect, there's no way he would choose her over me so why does she even try? GASP! What if Saiki is troubled by this? Maybe he's thinking something like, "I don't even have a chance with Teruhashi, she's so perfect and I'm just a nobody. Maybe a relationship with Aiura would make me feel better about how truly miserable and lonely I am." I have to talk to him and win him over!

That was a really long thought. I suppose Aiura wasn't wrong about Teruhashi being arrogant, but maybe they both are. Before I could escape, Teruhashi hopped over to us.

"Hey Saiki, would you mind walking me home from school today? I think I would feel a bit safer if I had somebody like you with me.." She gave me the worst, most captivating puppy-dog eyes she could muster. Luckily those don't work on me. Before I could respond, Aiura answered for me.

"Actually, he's got plans after school. Why don't you get one of your other boy-toys to walk with you?" Aiura retorted sarcastically. 

That girl is so arrogant! What on earth is her problem? I'm so tempted to punch her in the throat, but I won't since I'm a perfect pretty girl, so I'll do this instead.  Teruhashi's eyes watered up. I didn't think anybody could do that on command.

"I'm sorry.. it's just that there are a lot of trucks on my street doing road work, and I was hoping Saiki would help me to be more aware of them, since I trust him.." she spoke softly. Aiura actually gasped. She seemed to forget all about me being her "soulmate" as soon as Teruhashi was upset.

"I'm so sorry, Kokomi- you can walk home with him." Aiura backed off as a swarm of boys surrounded my desk- no, they flocked right to Teruhashi. I got swallowed up by the crowd immediately.

Angel Tears always work, even on the boldest of girls, Teruhashi thought, and stifled a smile.

After school that day, I did end up walking with Teruhashi. This all could have been avoided if I had been able to escape the classroom.

But nobody escapes Teruhashi's grasp.