𝗗 𝗘 𝗔 𝗧 𝗛'𝗦 𝗞 𝗜 𝗦 𝗦

1

The blueberry muffins were right in front of me. The smell of the berries assaulted my nostrils and as far as I was concerned, they were good. I knew my mother was only trying to help but didn't she know it was forbidden to eat them?

It was her idea I became a model. She could have at least pretended to love who I was becoming. All the hours, all the tears, all the blood, all this fucking time. It rewarded me with this, I thought that was what she wanted.

Why was she handing me these when she was the one who commented and insisted that all I ate wasn't made of grease and sugar?

"These look good, mother" I smiled, her eyes beaming with appreciation. I didn't want to disappoint her, she was the one who wanted everything to go as planned. She did all these efforts for me. How could I ever disappoint her?

"Thank you, baby, they're not for you though," she said and took them out of my sight. She always did this. Made me feel as if I was always asking too much while I was the one keeping this house and our family together.

"Go get ready for school, kid" my father ordered. He didn't ask, he commanded and I had to obey. Especially on his drunk days. If I didn't want him to hit mom again, I had to act and do everything he wanted. Otherwise, that wouldn't have been fun, right?

Leaving for school was like my savior. I didn't have to be who I was in this creepy house, I could be whoever I wanted. Everybody wanted to be me, they wanted me, that was enough. I didn't need more.

As always, my best friend, Nina Baker, drove us to school. We picked up spice latte and bagels which, were the only thing we were really allowed to eat as mannequins. The massive training was something else but this was supposed to be part of the easy thing, it definitely wasn't for me.

She lowered the music and I got out of the car, some of the guys already starting at us. Well, staring at Nina.

People might have wanted to be me but Nina? She was fabulous. She had this incredible long blonde hair that draw everybody's attention. I had long brown hair. She was an inch shorter than me but her style made up for what she was missing.

While she dressed fancily, I was either wearing a dress or jeans and a t-shirt. I didn't want people to look at me, not at school.

"Are you ready for another boring day?" She asked and linked her arm with mine. I smiled and held on to her. Sometimes it felt like what we had was real. I didn't know if we were only best friends because we were modeling together and because that was the thing to do.

We had been friends since kindergarten but I didn't know where we stood. I didn't really know who I was.

"Oh you know, very ready" I joked, her lips curving before kissing my cheek. At first, we tried not to brag about it. We loved it, it made us feel confident and the girls were nice, at first. But as we started modeling for a lingerie store, victoria's secret, boys were more into us. When we'd walk the halls, they would whistle and we'd give them the middle finger.

The usual.

We weren't just doing that but it was our mean business. We came into a pair. You got both or you got none. I wanted nothing more than to quit.

It was my passion. I loved posing and smiling and having free clothes. I used to look forward to the days my mother took me and looked out for me. I was her little princess, her little daughter. When I thought about it, I still loved to pose and smile.

It was very fun and of course, having free clothes was the best thing ever, including the paycheck.

But, the training was just too much. I wanted to eat the muffins, the candies, the popcorn. I wanted to be me. And it was forbidden to be you in modeling. I wouldn't have survived if I stuck to my personality.

I walked to my locker where Rika Fane was waiting for me. She was a sweet little girl. The one boys wanted because, she was hot and very beautiful and she had the wow factor. She was innocent, in other words, what the boys wanted. She wasn't an object though.

She was her own person and she didn't change it, she was who she was and she didn't act like somebody else. Maybe that was why I decided to tutor her instead of tutoring Miles.

She was much more smarter and she understood fast. Our study sessions were ten minutes about the theory and the rest was us gossiping. I considered my friend, my little sister. She was the only one I let see me.

"Hey, Ava!" She exclaimed, her hands hugging her textbooks. I turned around, thinking someone was there. Of course, I was just paranoid.

"Rika, hi. What's up?" I giggled and did my combo. My head ached as I opened it. It always happened once I was at school. The lack of water and food, that was what it did to me.

It took me a while to adjust as my brain was out of air. My vision turned black and I gasped, grasping the door of my locker.

"Ava, are you okay?" She brought me back to reality and I blinked until I saw something else than the darkness.

"I am fine," I said, grinning. She cared for me, didn't she? Maybe she was the only one, I wasn't ready to let her go.

"Are you sure? I can go get the n-"

"Rika!" I giggled, patting her arm.

"I am fine, so, what is it?" I asked, my head turning into a washing machine. I knew who I was pretending to be but I always failed at that when she was near. I could lie to her all I wanted but she always knew. She just never asked.

"I need you to come with me at the Crist's house tonight"

My eyes opened wide.

What in the fuck?

"What? Why?"

"You know why, because of Trevor" she whispered his name. I rolled my eyes at her. She was hot and beautiful, why wasn't she just owning it?

"I understand if you don't want to come I just-"

She trailed off, her eyes adverting to something or someone in the distance. I didn't have to ask at who she was staring at and why she stopped talking. I knew.

They were here.