A Bughead story

Chapter 24

I lock myself in a bathroom stall crying like any movie character ever to exist. I try and take slow breaths in and out. Slightly successful. I try to picture a happy place. I think of Betty and I solving Jason's murder. It was when we first started to fall in love and my dad wasn't in the picture. I realize that it's so difficult to remember because it happened what feels like ages ago. My happy place now? Jellybean and I watching the bee movie together.

I try and think of what's to happen. I can not live with Betty. I love her but I need space and she needs hers. We are seventeen and made to be living with our parents not each other. But where else could we live? My mom isn't going to help us. Dads in rehab. Little to no family around and none near here. Archie and I aren't getting along and I have no money. We'd get caught trying to live under the school stairs. Betty has screwed us. Completely. I wipe my tears away and look at my phone. A shitilion messages from Betty. School has a minute left. I get out of the bathroom and head towards my locker to grab my backpack and things. I don't want to go back to Bettys house. Not now at least. I decide to text Betty and I say *take jb back to your house please. I just need space* I send and go on my way. To where? I don't know. I can walk to pops. Not to far. After a moment of going through my options. I decide on pops. Best place ever and I can think there. I wonder if Betty will look for me there. While walking down to pops have to fight the voices in my head telling me to run farther than pops and into another town where nobody knows me.

I need my own vehicle and my dads motorcycle is the perfect option. Eventually I'll get it. I love Betty. But it's difficult to be with her sometimes. She survived her father the black hood and I somehow scared her by- whatever happened this morning in the bathroom. Scared her enough for her to tell Mrs. burble which she knew it would have consequences. Bad consequences. But it means she cared about my life. She loves me. I can picture a life with her. A beautiful life where we go to college together for some writing school or anything. We'd get married and solve crimes together. Love each other. Go on vacations and even have kids. If god gifts us. Or if she wanted my baby. That's what hurt most. She said that she was glad that she miscarried and didn't have my baby. I'd have a whole life laid out and then she goes and says that? Thanks a lot.

College. I haven't even had time to think about college. I always figured I'd go with Betty and hadn't given it a second thought. But now I'm doubtful. It's only a matter of time until she begins to believe Archie if she already hasn't. I see the bright red lights of pops and I feel a little better. I feel like I'm leaving jellybean behind. I have to talk to her about this. And what might happen because of Betty. No. I need to stop blaming her because it's my fault. Something is wrong with me. Something is terribly wrong with me. Why would I try and kill myself? For the same reason Betty would cut herself. Maybes she still does. No. There can't be a maybe. I turn around and head towards Bettys house. I need to deal with this whole ass situation without running away or putting it off. I have to talk to jb and I need to talk to Betty. I can't be like my dad and leaving them alone. This time I don't walk. Instead I run. Trying to get there as quickly as possible. My backpack bops up and down as I run.

As I am turning onto her street I am sweating and running as quickly as possible. I need to fix this. This is something worth fixing. I run past Archies house and then speed up the stairs at Bettys house and pound on the door. Suddenly I am met by the tear stained face of Betty. She is still crying. I want to hug her. Can I? Before I decide her voice croaks "I'm sorry jughead" she sobs. I take a step and pull her into my arms. "It's okay. I don't blame you, not anymore. I've thought and I've done this to myself. I was out of line yelling at you. I was just shocked. So I'm so sorry" I say if a soft voice and I swear I can feel the relief come off the both of us. She continues sobbing and I know something else is wrong. "Betty?" I ask and she buries her head into my chest. "I feel terrible about what I said." She cries and as much as I want to tell her it's okay I can't. Because it's not. "I feel terrible about the things I said to you. It's not your fault. I was angry and I needed to take it out on someone." I say because it's all I can come up with. I need to find jellybean soon. She nods her head. "Can we talk about this later? I have to talk to jellybean." I ask her and she backs away from my grip and I rush upstairs to jellybean. "Jughead?" Betty says and I turn around to look at her with tears in both of our eyes. "She's upset" Betty says and wipes her eyes. I nod my head and sigh. I reach the guest room and softy knock on the door. No response. I creek the door open and I see her laying on the bed with her eyes closed, hand folded on her lap blocking me off and earbuds in. I want to walk towards her but I decide to give her time. I walk down stairs and Betty looks shocked to see me so quickly. "She didn't want to talk" I say half lying and half telling the truth. I am now noticing I haven't seen Alice and I wonder where she is. "Where- where is your mom?" I stutter. I know she sometimes goes to work for long periods and doesn't come back. "Work" betty simply replied. I nod and cautiously sit down a few inches away from her. I think about anything I could say to her. "Halloween. Would you still like to go with me? Matching costumes. I'd understand if you didn't want to." I say remembering when she tried to talk to me about it and I shut her down. "Yeah I'd love to" she says with a half smile. I have no idea what our costumes could be so I say "did you have any ideas? I'm kind of clueless." I admit and she giggles. I'm so thankful for this moment because everything is okay. "I have one idea. From the Adams family? I could be Morticia and you could be Gomez, if jellybean wanted she could be Wednesday" She sounded so excited that I couldn't refuse- not that I wanted to because this sounds like a fucking awesome idea. I frantically nod. "That's a great idea I love it! I knew you'd come up with something awesome" I tell her and she smiles. It's funny that I still get butterflies in my stomach every time I see her. "We can go shopping this weekend?" She proposes and I nod. I can't stop thinking about how much I love her and how much I hurt her. "I love you and I'm sorry" I blurt out I didn't mean to say it out loud but I know that I did when she climbs over and lays on top of me. "I'm sorry. I forgive you and most of all I love you Jughead Jones" she says placing a kiss on my cheek and I turn my head to softly kiss her lips. My face is kept in place by her hands. After a moment or two she lays her head on my shoulder and asks if we can watch a Halloween movie. I told her sure. We decided on watching scream. Classic. "Can you ask jellybean if she wants to watch it with us?" I ask Betty and she nods getting up as I try and find scream. As I finally find it I hear someone coming down the stairs so I quickly turn my head and I see only Betty down the stairs with a Frown I knew what this meant. Jellybean probably thought I was abandoning her. Everyone else has. Our mom and our dad. Even me. I try to brush it off  but I feel like a hole has been punctured through my heart. "Jug it's okay, she's allowed to be angry and she'll forgive you" Betty says noticing my expression. "Let's just watch the movie, yeah?" I say sitting down and she follows after me laying next to me. I place my hand on her hip because I know it drives her crazy. She throws a cozy blanket over us and we cuddle while watching scream. She got scared during a few parts and I could tell because she'd grip my hand or bury her head in my neck. I love horror movies. They remind me that anything can happen at any time.