My Life Good And Bad

been awhile

Okay here I go again.

Some stuff has happened since the last time I updated this and since I updated my other book.
School has ended and I officially finished my sophomore year of high school I am now going to be going into my junior year of high school after summer ends which I am not looking forward to that.
I will not very much has happened towards work or anything I haven't found a new job I've been trying to find a new job because some recent news came up that my boss is retiring and he's selling his establishment. So now I've been busy looking for a job and no place will hire me back will not hire me back or just hire me I've been trying to get a hired at multiple different places nothing not even a call back not even an interview so let's go great for me totally yeah. My relationship with my girlfriend has been doing great well besides the concert fights we've been having and arguing and just I don't know a lot of people are telling me that we hit like the 8 9-month art of our relationship and a lot of people are telling me that like it happens to every relationship you start fighting and it's like the make or break point of the relationship and I don't know if I should believe them or not so yeah there's that.
A lot of fights between my mom and dad or me and my dad have been happening and going to totally crap so everything's just like broken and I'm so tired.
And I want to talking about having kids with my girlfriend has been really on my shoulders we're both trans girl my girlfriend and me trans guy. So I would be the one carrying the child so I would be a seahorse dad technically. Kings well you know seahorses instead of a female caring baby and giving birth to the baby it's the male carrying the baby I giving birth to the baby so therefore I would be a seahorse dad technically and my girlfriend would be a seahorse mom. But technically we've been talking about it we're still teenagers we don't know what we want yet. You think you're going to be and of course we're going to have kids way later on if we both still want kids and it's scary for me to think about that because I'm just like what if the kid turns out just like me and has a lot of these health issues and so on and so forth or what if this kid grows up to hate me or something and I realize it's out of my control but it's something that just makes me panic.
So yeah there's that there's a lot of wearing on that side of the story and a whole bunch of talking about my future if I'm going to go to cosmetology like do makeup do hair that stuff or by going to go into tattooing like I wanted to either one sounds great but both sound expensive.
But whatever I can't decide that now of course I'm only 16 and still in high school but it's still worries me a lot. I thinking about the future makes me want to break down and worry and just God I don't know anymore.
I'm just a lot of things have happened I have a chosen family now the family chose to be around my friend one of my friends she feels like family to me after a long time and so does her mom and her uncle and her brothers now too. And it's amazing to me how I always thought I was just going to be by myself Fighting by myself and everything but I'm not anymore I got my friends and everything and I don't know what to say or do or anything at all.
Tow to end this and not make it too long thank you very much for reading if anybody is reading this and I will hopefully get to see all of those beautiful names read my book the next time I update thank you bye see you guys later.