Redemption Song | Levi & Eren

Chapter 9: Honesty

      Levi sat in silence with Petra. The patrol car was parked hidden behind nature facing the main road. Their concealed position gave them the perfect cover to check other vehicles' speed as they drove by.

Petra picked at her fingernails she'd chose not to decorate out of professionalism. The uncomfortable tension in the car she'd yet to adapt to left the skin around her nails cut and red. She hadn't bleed and only cared if the blood accidently spilt into Levi's provided car.

Levi had noticed her nervous habit early on but had yet to comment on it. He was used to worse forms of self-harm for more concerning reasons. He'd trained himself to resist the urge to show nervousness around others resulting in them believing he felt no emotions at all.

A car drove by. Levi checked the TruCam's screen displaying the previously passed vehicle's speed. Satisfied that it was an acceptable speed, he sat back and waited for the next car.

Petra swallowed her spit without noise. The road was desolate meaning nothing could distract him. "Did you have a good evening, sir?" she asked.

Levi responded after a few seconds had passed. "It was different."

The word fit well. Eren had ordered a unique order but he was too tired to complain. The small chocolate tasted wrong to him until Eren insisted that's what they tasted like. He'd ignored the toy inside the green capsule which Eren snatched immediately.

Levi went to bed and decided not to question why Eren had bought a large takeout with desert and not a blanket for his sofa bed.

"Different in what way?" Petra pressed, respectfully.

Levi chose to keep the information regarding adopting an addict to himself.

"Just different." he figured summed up his night well.

Levi's short answers left Petra more discomforted. She'd yet to uncover how to approach Levi. He appeared to respect direct questions instead of dancing around a subject and wasting his time but she was unsure what questions he would answer.

"I don't suppose you've heard anything regarding Marco." she paused. "The attempted-"

"Jumper. I remember," he interjected. The young man who may have taken his own life mere days ago had Levi not intervened. "No, but that's to be expected. There's no need for the hospital to do a follow-up with us."

"Does that mean we might never know what happened to him?" she queried, concern unmistakable in her tone.

"Presumably. Unless it's an ongoing case or heading towards a court you won't be asked questions about it." Levi saw the discouragement on her face out of the corner of his eye. He had to remind himself not everyone was as despairing as he was. He was able to head home after a shift and forget about his day. So far, she carried her worries with her. "It's better this way. You can't afford to get attached to the people you help, especially the mentally ill."

Petra registered his advice. "Better for who, exactly?"

"For both of you. You're a police officer for more than one person. Everyone needs our help. You need to recognise that there's only so much we can do and that we can't provide the psychiatric help the mentally ill need. Eventually, you'd have to cut ties with them and if they're too attached to you it could have disastrous effects. You'll carry that guilt with you even after you inevitably quit."

She changed the subject. "Did you mean what you said? About hating being a PTO?"

Levi sighed. "I'd prefer not to teach but I'm here and there's no getting out of it."

Once more, the car entered a stage of gauche silence. The seriousness in his tone sounded dissimilar. Levi was a composed man speaking from experience and logic. However, he would occasionally disclose helpful fragments of information without specific details that made her question whether they were anecdotes or personal history?