OUTCASTS • Eddie Munson

Drinks

Ellie wasn't sure where she was going. She rode her bike for what felt like hours, only stopping once to fill it with gas, and then continued riding again. The night sky made the world around her feel as though it was closed off, the only thing that existed to her were the things in her line of sight.

Her mind raced with thoughts over what had happened. She was happy that Max was okay, but she felt so stupid. Why would they give a shit about her? It's not like any of them really knew her anyway.

How did people even make friends? She wasn't sure she would ever cross the border in friendship that landed her on the side of people caring for her again. Every fucking time she thought she found someone to care about, something like this happens, and it's fucked again. The only exception to this was Billy, and if there were an afterlife, he definitely witnessed Lucas telling her to fuck off, and that annoyed her more than anything.

Billy's grave was like a safe space to her, and now it was desecrated, not only by Vecna's attempt on Max's life, but also by Lucas, putting an end to the lies she'd been telling Billy.

She liked to think that he could hear her, so whenever she went to visit him, she'd tell him about how great she was doing, never for a second wanting him to worry about her. She lied through her teeth every time she was there, trying to convince his spirit that she was okay without him, and also trying to convince herself.

She wasn't okay.

She wasn't sure she'd ever be okay again.

So when she came to a stop at the cliff of Sattler Quarry, she half wanted to throw herself off it. She wiped the tears from her eyes, and threw her helmet to the side.

Her shaky hands pulled a cigarette from the almost empty pack, and she lit it, the orange glow from the flame reflecting on her face.

She breathed out the smoke slowly, letting her shoulders relax for the first time since she first met up with the group this morning.

The headlight of her bike remained on, casting a dim light over the area, allowing her to see where she was. She could see the ledge overlooking the quarry, but nothing else, everything was black.

The only thing that wasn't completely casted by shadows was the sky, it looked like glitter, thousands of stars dotted across it.

Ellie sighed, making her way to the ledge before laying down. Her arm supported her head as she just stared at the sky.

All of her problems felt meaningless when compared to the expansion of the earth, not to mention the potential life past earth.

"Fuck it." She whispered to herself, not talking about anything in particular.

She watched the stars for hours, watching how they looked as though they moved as the planet spun. She tried to make pictures out of them, ignoring the constellations and instead forming her own.

When they started to disappear with the morning light, she could hear her intrusive thoughts approaching again.

She groaned as she sat up, her back hurt and her muscles felt stiff.

The air felt light and cold on her skin, making her feel refreshed even though she once again hadn't slept. At times like this she needed a joint.

Unfortunately her stuff was at home, which meant she had to move.

She lit a cigarette as she watched the sun rise over the quarry, making the sky turn into a beautiful shade of oranges and reds, a beautiful start for what would probably be a shitty day.

Her cigarette burned her fingers as it got down to the filter, and she hissed in pain, feeling even more awake after the sudden shock.