(24) - Soul killer

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It was past three at dawn when I woke up
Heavy breaths, forehead that is full of sweat,
I dreamt the scariest thing I ever dreamed:
to be in a world, with selfish and cruel people, in a darkest dim.

A tear fell in my cheeks, as a sudden memoir escaped.
I gasped and covered my mouth to hide the annoying sobs and unwanted screams.
I hold my breath for the longest time, trying to be freed by the tight grip
"How could you do this to me? When I trusted you the most among them." - I whispered,  in a broken and trembling voice, trying to plead for him to stop even when the worst thing already happened in my dream.

I stood up, wiping the tears streaming down my face.
"It was just a dream." I convinced my unbothered self.
I took a step forward down to the kitchen, with hitching breath, I tried  not to sob again
I got drunk with the coldest water I could get and made myself clear in mind  with a thought, trying not to be ashamed; "You are not the problem dear, the society it is."

I get back to my room, yawning and trying to get back to sleep.
But as I closed my eyes, the darkness gave me the reason to open my eyelids again.
I screamed, as I saw the light, you came in with the mischievous smile I ever loathed and scared of.
I run. I tried to run faster than I could, just to escape from your sight, being afraid of your touch again.

"Ah!" I cried, as I stumbled and got frightened by your wicked mock and deadly stare.
"No!" I shouted in fear, as you started to grab my wrist, pinning me on the ground, rambling me with your dirtiest hands.
"I hate you," I mumbled as I couldn't stop you from touching me, again.
"Please, stop!" I yelped in tears as I hardly pushed you just so I could get off your harsh grasp from my trembling body, again.
"Die in hell!" with the minimum courage I shouted as I stabbed you with a knife.

I gasped and was shocked by the happenings.
"No!" I cried and sulked myself in the darkest corner of my room, as I realized that I dreamt what I hate to dream for the nth time tonight, again.
And how unfortunate it is, when I couldn't dare to kill you even just in my dreams.

The only killer of my inner self and my soul. My nightmare.

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