you will always be my home

TW// SELF HARM
also I recommend listening to the song while you read :))

no ones pov:

Kara was out fighting a Fort Rozz escapee. Lena was terrified. She could not have the same thing that happened last time happen again.

She decided to take a seat because her heart was beginning to race at an irregular rate. Right whenevever she sat down, Kara came back. "Oh thank god." Lena muttered. "Lena it's really not that deep, i'm fine, aren't I always fine?" Kara stated with an attitude.

"Seriously Kara? Am I not allowed to worry?!" Lena practically yelled. "Lena stop screaming! Yes you are allowed to worry, I just don't think that it's as serious as you are making it." Kara said again. "What is wrong with you? Are you infected with Red Kryptonite?" Lena asked concerned. "Oh my Rao Lena! There is nothing wrong with me, stop worrying so damn much." Kara said clearly annoyed. "Are you kidding me?! Kara I had a fucking heart attack because of how worried I was about you! Stop making my feelings invalidated." Lena said. "Listen, Lena I don't want to fight. Can we just stop this!" Kara yelled. "Kara! We are in our fucking living room screaming at each other. We are already fighting!!" Lena yelled.

"My Rao this is so stupid." Kara muttered. "What was that, Kara? Me loving you and caring about you is stupid?! Maybe I was right back then! Maybe you are an inconsiderate bitch." Lena screamed. "ME?! Lena you wont even stop for a damn second to listen to me!" Kara yelled again. "I- Kara I think you need to leave. At least for a few days I don't want to see you right now." Lena said. "Lena please!! Just yesterday we were taking a bubble bath together saying we would never let go." Kara said trying to hold Lena's hand.

Lena quickly jerked away. "Well things change Kara, just like how yesterday you gave a shit about my feelings. I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't give a flying fuck about my opinions or worries." Lena stated. Kara scoffed, "You know that eventually a few days will turn into years. You're insane Lena. You're making absolutely NOTHING into some stupid shit!" Kara yelled. "GET THE HELL OUT!" Lena said almost breaking down. Kara went and packed her stuff in ten seconds, using her superspeed, and walked out of the door slamming it. She lingered by the door for a few minutes and thought, We're engaged. She- I- we're engaged.

(TW)
While Kara was outside thinking, Lena took a knife from their kitchen drawer a brought it to her carotid artery. Lena whimpered loudly in pain as she slashed her neck open, and fell to the ground in a pool of blood. Kara heard Lena's whimper and rushed back into their home. "OH MY RAO NO!!! LENA NO!" Kara screaming picking up Lena and flying her to the DEO.

Once Kara made it she saw Alex, and yelled at her to get a stretcher. When Alex got the stretcher Kara sat Lena down, who was covered in blood. "Alex you have to save her. Th- this is all my fault." Kara said breaking down. "You did this Kara?! What the hell is wrong with you!?" Alex yelled.
"NO! Alex I did not slice my fiancé's neck open. But I was the reason she did it."

As Alex walked out of the OR, leaving the other surgeons to stop Lena's bleeding, she demanded a response from Kara. "I yelled at her, cursed, screamed, told her she cared too much. Alex, i'm the biggest idiot, I can't live with my self like this, knowing that this is my fault." Kara said, tears streaming her face. "Now Kara, we don't entirely know that this is your fault. Don't be so quick to place blame." Alex said trying to comfort her sister. "Alex you don't understand. The things I said. If Lena had said them to me I would've been pushed over the edge too. And now, theres a possibility she wont pull through. And it'll be all my fault." Kara muttered. Alex gave Kara a look of pity and said, "I have my best doctors in there working on your girl, she'll pull through lil' sis." Alex said smiling.

Kara couldn't help but think to herself, What if she pulls through and hates me. And wants nothing to do with me.

________________________

Lena had been in a sleep coma for a few days as Kara began to worry. But, a few hours later Lena had finally woken. Kara was the first one to notice, as she grasped onto Lena's hand when she awoke, then quickly pulled away as she thought she would hurt Lena. "Hey baby!! I missed you so much." Kara squealed to Lena but Lena didn't flinch a mussle, it almost looked as if there was hatred in her eyes, but Kara hadn't noticed, she was too excited. "I want to say i'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I understand that worry now, that constant longing of 'when will she wake up' 'i hope shes okay' 'i miss her.' I'm sorry, Lena for walking out of that door, without sorting things out. I swear to every god, i'll never leave you again, not even for a second, i want to fight for us." Kara said in one breath. "Kara.." Lena finally spoke up. "You've already said you won't leave me again whenever you came back left me for Mon-El. I already took your bullshit excuses So I don't give a shit anymore. I truly hate you. And i'm tired of your excuses, I cannot believe I ever loved you."

Kara's heart split in two. "W- What..." She whispered. "You fucking heard me." Lena said, anger clear in her voice. But, what Kara didn't know was that Lena did not mean a word of this. With her brain activity being off for a few days, her temporal lobe was damaged. But Kara believed it. After all that working on their relationship, nearly two years of being hopelessly
inlove, Kara believed that Lena truly did not love her, that this was the end of 'Kara and Lena.'

Kara slowly turned around and headed to wherever her feet would lead her. Her thoughts raced back to the first day he and Lena met, Lena
was charming, and her smile could light up the entire room. And the way Kara defended Lena, to every one who doubted her. Then she thought to the moment she found out Lena was attracted to girls, which was also the moment she felt hope for them, even though she was in a relationship.

Then she thought to the moment when she told Lena she loved her for the first time, 'Whenever i'm around you- i'm weak, vulnerable. In my bed at night, I toss and turn thinking about you. I'm falling inlove with you. No one has ever made me feel this way- and what you make me feel is undescribable. I just don't know what to do with it. I know this- us- means nothing to you, but I needed to get that off of my chest.' Then she thought to when she asked Lena to marry her. And whenever they both got rings and Lena said, 'I guess we were both ready to spend the rest of our lives with each other.'

Kara had tears streaming down her face at this point. "I was so ready to spend the rest of my life with you Lena Luthor." She muttered. Her heart felt like it was shattered, she was trying to wipe the tears off of her face but they just kept coming. "This pain is never ending isn't it." Kara said walking into the kryptonite emitters room.

It was as if everything was in slow motion. The excruciating pain Kara felt, she was off the high she and Lena both had been feeling for a while- together. Kara sat on the ground, empty, yet she felt so much pain. Lena doesn't love me. She thought. After everything, every promise, I screwed everything up! The woman I am supposed to marry in a few weeks doesn't love me. She thought. The system breached as she turned the emitters to 100%. But the DEO agents weren't fast enough to save Kara. It was too late. As Kara took her last breath she whispered, "Lena Luthor, you will always be my home."

                   - The end.