(Ghost of you- 5 seconds of summer) For @jentle_taester
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L IS FOR LOVE BUT L IS FOR LOST LOST LOVE -sad -very sad -did I mention sad?
Today was one of those hard days and Taehyung knows this. If the crying of his 5 year old was enough. She had woken up groggy, then she didn't feel like getting dressed for school. Taehyung never believed it before now, but he has the impeding feeling that she can tell. Could feel the ever lasting darkness, emptiness, in the house.
Shes crying still, screaming upstairs, and no amount of pleading he'd try with her would sooth her woe. So he's seated in the kitchen coffee mug in front of him, too cold to drink now. He plays with the buttons on his phones until it rings up the number he's looking for.
"Taehyung?" The voice is soft, aged but soft and familiar. He feels something in his chest and it makes him want to throw up, he feels as if he's sinking under it all. Barely able to breath, the voice calls out his name again.
"Mrs kim." He lets out through his dry vocals cords, he eyes the unmoved coffee, as still as an empty lake. "I don't-I" he finds it hard to admit the troubles he's having, the lack of parenting he has.
"Taehyung-ah? Is everything okay?" She asks, "is that Areum crying?"
He hums, feeling as if the words he need to speak are caught in a tight ball pushing at the inside of his throat. His fingers tremble around the phone, he bows his head. A tear he hadn't even realized was settling in his eye drips to the table splattering against the white marble counter.
"I tried-I did-I don't know, she's having a hard time."
Mrs kim hums on the other line, he can't see her but can already imagine the sad frown on her face the lines of stress creasing above her brow. "I'm on my way, make some hot chocolate for her in the mean time-" theirs a weird end to the sentence as if she meant to say more. Taehyung answers her and puts the phone down. He sighs and rubs the palms of his hands against the side of his face. His shoulders ache and he grumbles from the sharp pain in the front of his head.
He pushes out of the chair and makes his way up the polished wooden steps, the wails become louder as he draws closer, Taehyung momentarily turns his head to the pictures hanged on the wall, it was of him and her, Jennie, and their little baby swaddled in her arms. He stops and looks at the picture, taking it in trying to relive the memory in his head. Jennie looks beautiful, as she always did, her eyes bright and shining with the back flash of a camera, her Apple cheeks round and etched by a big smile, she hadn't worn any makeup for this photoshoot and Taehyungs glad because he gets to admire the little mole under her brow.
After that he takes a pit stop at their room, he pushes the door open. The room that used to be his favorite place to be, now filled his mouth with a sour taste, it made the base of his head hurt. Filled his chest with disdain. After the accident, he'd been avoiding the room. Hoping that if less bodies took up the room the scent of her would last.
