Song: feel something - Bea Miller
"Here we go again, huh." She sighed while dragging the drunk girl to the bedroom.
"Sage is that you?"
Sage hadn't answered Michelle, she opened the wardrobe with a huge hill of clothes and was wondering why her roommate had to drink until that point, it wasn't good for her or anybody around her. After picking up a t-shirt and shorts, she seated next to Michelle laid on the bed trying to maintain her heavy opened eyes.
"Yes, it 's me." Her voice was hoarse and low. "Let me just help you change."
She slowly took off Michelle's leather jacket and the jeans by withdrawing the belt around her waist already untied.
What? What is that? Sage had her eyes frozen on Michelle's tights. Little scratches? No. She pulled down the jeans a little more. Cuts. Yet stained with blood... She hurried to the arms of the body on the bed. Both with deep and large cuts all over the dark skin, next to the old scars.
"What are you doing? Are you listening to me?"
Sage was sleepy and, besides, worried. She fell to her knees, Michelle's words evaporating from her mind. How didn't she notice? She had wondered, folding the jeans. Why hadn't Michelle reached her?
"Dude I don't want to sleep!" Michelle protested once her friend covered her with blankets.
"You can barely stand... Stay quiet."
Said this, she walked to the desk in front of the window. On top of it was Michelle's diary. Lonely, vulnerable, and sad. It was a simple petite black notebook with "THINGS I WANTED TO SAY BUT NEVER DID" written on the cover with correction fluid and skulls she drew. She opened it, not for the first time, carefully to not let the torn papers between the pages fall. In the last pages, also with skulls spread on them, was the date of that day and, above that, a big text where Michelle placed every frankness of her.
«My tendons are inflamed, I squirm with stomachaches, my eyes widen as my heart stops for half a second. I'm so tired... I'm so tired. Just tired. Tired. Something is feeding on me and my vital forces, calmly eating me slowly, torturing me, leaving this central organ of my blood circulation, the nucleus, the center of sensations, perceptions, and emotions for the last. The soul flees from me, simply disappearing through my fingers.»
«And we'll just wait for our death, suffering in silence, avoiding showing your emotions, and keep failing in life.»
«The bruises... Wish I could care more, try harder... Why did I turn this way? When? How? It's like my memory had been stolen and that's just how I was born: sick»
Sage closed it, confused, feeling worthless, and turned to the bed to find it empty. "Michelle!"
She left the room in a hurry, the living room was also empty. A cold breeze crossed the space: the balcony's sliding door was opened. Michelle was there, seated on the raw floor, a cigarette between her fingers.
"Dude!" She roared after it got crushed on the wall.
Sage seated next to her with a groan and laid down her head on Michelle's shoulder.
"You know... you can always talk to me right?"
"I know... you are pretty annoying."
The girl tried to get up but failed. With the help of Sage, she made it back to the room. Her mind was empty, the alcohol was trying to delete the struggling that deep down Michelle knew she wouldn't get away from.
"Ok... Try to sleep, please!" Sage turned off the lights.
"No..." Michelle moaned. "Stay with me please."
"You just called me annoying and now you want me next to you?"
She ceded, thinking about how lonely Michelle must have been feeling, the emptiness and despair... An image of Michelle crying, sobbing, and bleeding in the bathroom flashed on Sage's mind. She wanted to comfort the other girl, even though she wouldn't show her emotions. Michelle was pretty good at hiding her emotions not just from the people around her, but also from herself. She'd bury them deep inside her subconscious, smile, and pretend she wasn't putting up with demons every day. Sometimes it would work and she'd forget about it, she'd distract herself either with music, anime, books, or even Sage.
The aforenamed surrendered herself and laid on the mattress.
"Closer!"
Sage moved a little closer. It was dark, but she could see the other girl staring at her. She was expecting Michelle to drop the role and start crying, hug her, and vent. But Michelle didn't. Instead, she grabbed Sage's chin and leaned forward to kiss the lips she's been wishing for so long.
"Michelle... Stop!" Sage refused calmly.
With her eyes semi-closed, Michelle was smiling like accepting the loss, even though her heart had just been crushed. Unhurriedly she left Sage's chin and closed her eyes, holding the tears.
YOU ARE READING
I Hate My Roommate
Teen Fiction«It felt like things were going back to normal, their balance, the peace between those walls that sooner or later would reach a climax and everything would break into pieces, it would look like the damage is irretrievable and there's no turning back...
