Pretty lies

eighteen- Wendy's

Santiago Rose:

I'm really fucking panicking right now. For the past hour, I have been trying to come up with a way to tell my sister about Phoebe.

She is going to flip the fuck out. Money is really tight and I know that. Isa's already working two jobs and we barely meet rent. We can't afford a baby.

I can't leave Phoebe alone in this. I love her, truly I do. Some time ago, I found her crying behind a Wendy's. Her boyfriend had just dumped her for her cousin. She was heartbroken.

We became close, friends even. I ended up fighting the ex boyfriend when he tried to get her back. Phoebe and I started dating two weeks later.

I thought we were being careful but I guess these things just happen. We watched a movie about teen pregnancy in health class. According to the video, I'm probably going to end up being a drug dealer and Phoebe an unlicensed beautician.

That's what Isa is going to say. She is going to freak out. My sister is ill. I don't know what's wrong with her but Silvia says it's something in her head. She takes pills a lot. I don't know if she is meant to take them.

I'm not too smart so I can't really understand what is going on with her. Mia says she knows but she won't tell me what it is. I think she's bullshitting me.

If Silvia's right and there is something wrong with Isa's head, there is no way she is going to handle this well.

Maybe I need to plan an escape route

Isadora Rose:

My eyes flutter open as I peer around the room. The man next to me was in a deep sleep.

What happened was impulsive and spontaneous? I fucking loved it. A part of me does, at least. The other part feels like I have done some kind of injustice.  I don't know if it's too me or Silvia or the kids. It's weird.

I sit up from the bed and I grab my phone from my pants pocket. The time reads 04:56 am.

The sun has yet to rise but I know it will soon. Sun rises in the summer are so beautiful. I used to watch them with my cousin, Iris, all the time.

She lived next door to me. My family had this thing about always staying close. Her dad died ten years ago and her mom never really got over it.

My mom was a huge alcoholic so she got my aunt into it too. I hated what they did. My dad did all those steroids and shit. I hated that too.

Santiago knew what they were like as people and 'parents'. I always tried to shield the kids from the abuse but I failed on some occasions. Mia got hit and Santiago would get kicked. Rico was only two when I left and brought them with me. This is his whole life.

Rico asked a couple times on Mother's Day why he didn't have a mom. That broke my heart. I told him that he had one but she had to go for a little while. He was quick to deflect the topic and move on. I know he understands things to a certain degree but I can't have him lose his childhood, stressing over a woman who does not love him.

Before I got custody, I took the kids away from home and I fucking ran. We lived out of a shitty Prius before our court date. My friend's brother was some big shot lawyer so he helped us through everything. We wouldn't be together if it wasn't for him.

My dad tried to find us a few times over the years. He would bash down motel doors until he gave up. My mom would call and call. The rest of the family disowned me. I haven't seen Iris in those five years.

I don't really talk about what happened before I left. Only Tristan knows the whole story. He lived on my block growing up. We went to school together, we smoked in the park together. It was always us.

His family moved away a couple moved before I did. I found him in New York when we moved down here. The only reason I survived here was because of money abuela and Tristan gave me.

I always try to pay him back but he refuses ever single time. He doesn't like it he says. It's a thank you he says. For what, I have no clue.

The sky is painted with tiny stars, each one shining on its own. I can't wait for the sun to rise and light up the sky with reds and yellows. It's magical.

I want to say that ,laying here, I don't have a bad thought on my mind. I really fucking want to. A part of me loves the idea of me having fun ,but the other part feels so guilty.

I left those kids when they didn't need to be left. I could've stayed and found out what was going on with Santiago or asked Mia if that girl needs a slap.

They are my life. Abuela kept us going but now she's not here to do so. It's just us against the world.

That velvet box has been sat in the corner of my room since the day before abuela died. She said to open it once she died ,but I just can't bring myself to do it. I get really close to it, to acceptance. I never follow through.

Alessandro begins to stir in his sleep as he turns around towards me. I sit there, completely still, not wanting to wake him.

He soon falls asleep and settles into his pillow. I can't help but admire his sharp features. He looked very different to Lucas. Lucas had light brown hair that was almost blonde, he had these emerald eyes and a crooked smile. Alessandro is much tall and bigger with a pearly white smile and a mysterious aura about him.

His life is one I would read about ; I know he is rich as fuck and I'm sure he gets around with women. We are both whores in our own way, I guess.

I can love someone one second but the second I don't, I will be looking for someone else. Alessandro has a fucking bedroom in his office and it's obvious what it's for. I noticed a draw in his office. It's locked.

It could be just one of those things that are just there. It could be a secret sex toy drawer. It could have an assassination plan for the president. Alessandro's a strange guy so there's no reading him.

It takes me a couple of minutes to find my clothes and gather myself. I take another look back at a sleeping Alessandro before walking out the door.

I have done the whole walk of shame thing before ,but this time feels different. I don't know.