Pretty lies

fifty seven- why, oh why

Frankie:

I have never seen someone look so peaceful.

After the crash, none of us have been the same. Tristan is angry at everyone and everything, so much so you now hear him way before you see him. I don't even want to think about what Silvia is doing. I caught her on the back steps of the hospital with a blunt in hand sitting with some 'recovering' alcoholic. Amaya is always the one who tries stay strong for those around her even when she feels as if her world is collapsing. We had to beg her to take Silvia away in hopes it would do the both of them some good, but now we haven't heard from either of them in almost twenty four hours.

Isadora was always the glue in our group. If someone had gone through some shit in our lives, she'd be at their side in minutes. She has held me when I cried more times then I care to count. I know she isn't dead, she is laying in-front of me. But it still feels like she's gone and that hurts me a little more every passing day.

Brushing her hair away from her face, all I can do is look at her. I can't laugh with her or properly hold her hand like I burn to. For what feels like an eternity I just stay by her side and tell her how everything is going to be okay or how much we all miss her sweet smile.

"I am so sorry, Isa. We tried, we tried really hard." I whisper more to myself than her.

"You know, one day we'll laugh at all of this. This life won't consume you like I know it does and it'll just become on of those blurred, distant memories. I know how much you want to do this for your family but we can't lose you. I can't lose you. I love you, Isa. I always have and I always will." my thoughts just spill out as my hand instinctively reaches out for hers.

In my head, she is holding my hand just as tight as I am holding hers and she would reach up to wipe away the tears I didn't know had fallen. I'd look at woman that I love and she would tell me that she loves me too. I'd have the cheesiest grin plastered across my face before my lips would crash down against hers. That would be the start of a beautiful love story, one for the ages I'd say.

But, like I know it is, it is just in my head.

Isadora Rose:

Why can't I move?

Why can't I see?

Who the fuck is talking?

A million thoughts come rushing to me as all I can do is tense up and allow the sweltering heat burn down on me. Nothing makes sense, but it does. I am dead, but I am not. It could be my inner psyche talking or it could be the drugs- drugs.

Am I on drugs?

Did I relapse?

Questions, questions and more questions. There are so fucking many of them and I just can't breathe- breathe.

I couldn't breathe.

I remember that I couldn't breathe. But, why?

Still more questions yet so few answers. Slowly but surely, my body lets go and here I lay in the light. A bright, bright light- light.

There were headlights.

Something happened. I couldn't breathe, there were headlights and now I'm on drugs.

Soon enough it clicks. The memory comes back in fragments, each piece darker than the last.

Iris had tried to kill me and she almost did. If it weren't for Tristan, I would've drowned just like my cousin wanted. He saved me. Again.

Too many thoughts surround me now and I feel as if they are about to close in on me. The dagger of Iris' betrayal only deepens in my chest. It hurts more than I care to admit but I can't seem to let it out.

Nothing can come out. Nothing. No noise, no movement, no feeling. Nothing.

This feeling is so apparent in my soul that I can't bare to imagine how my younger siblings feel. They never knew Iris like I did. They didn't walk hand in hand with her to class when she was too scared of her biology teacher. They didn't braid her hair for the school recital when her mother was too drunk to do so. I did. I did it all yet she saw none of it.

Why couldn't she just see?

Open-

Why couldn't she open her eyes and see?

Your-

Why couldn't she? Was she too blind to see it? Or did she see it all through a red tint?

Eyes-

"Welcome back princess."