Not good for you

40;

NOW

After about twenty minutes of driving in silence, Seeley pulled up to a bar. Music could be heard from the inside as people were getting drunk and having fun. I noticed him clenching his jaw multiple times and tightening his bloody fingers around the steering wheel. As he removed the keys from the ignition, I gazed at the flickering lights, and he turned to me with vacant eyes.

"Are you coming in?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. I ran my tongue over my lips.

"I'd prefer to go home."

He cleared his throat and opened his door.

"Then you can walk home if you can't tolerate being near me."

"Seeley, it's not—" I tried to argue, but he slammed the door and headed toward the bar. I glanced around the dim street before pushing my door open to follow him. He frightened me in a way, yet I didn't want to leave his side.

Rushing into the bar, I was greeted by warm air and the scent of sweat. Since it was already late, the place was bustling with people playing pool and drinking to excess.

I spotted Seeley at the bar ordering a drink. The bartender shook Seeley's hand before grabbing a glass. So, they knew each other—great, that made me worry we wouldn't be leaving anytime soon. Ignoring the curious glances I received from others, I made my way to him. I took a seat next to him on a barstool and slightly shook my head when the bartender looked at me as if asking if I wanted a drink.

I had already had enough to drink at the Drewitt house before things spiraled out of control after Seeley arrived. I studied him quietly as he downed his scotch in one swift motion. My eyes widened as he slammed the glass down and signaled the bartender for a refill.

"Seeley, I know you're upset..."

He scoffed, tilting his head slightly as his expression hardened.

"Upset doesn't even begin to describe what I'm feeling right now, Heds," he replied, watching the bartender work.

My chest tightened at the sight of his suffering. He deserved better than this. He shouldn't have had to drown in his feelings and guilt all these years.

Despite not deserving any of it, he was one of the most heartbroken people I had ever seen. I found myself reflecting on his deceased sister and mother, realizing they must have tormented him for years without my knowledge. He knew a lot about me since I had trusted him, but it seemed he never truly returned that trust. Although he didn't owe me every detail of his life, even after all this time, he still lied to me when I asked that one question about his mother. Yet, I understood why he chose not to talk about her.

I still can't believe what happened. Years ago, Seeley's mother and twin sister died, leaving Oswald heartbroken, but he could never overcome his grief and thus blamed Seeley for their deaths all his life. Punishing him, he was always an unavailable father but showed affection to Perkyn, separating happiness and pain in his life between his two sons. How could anyone do something like that?

"I want you to know I'm here for you," I said, resting my hand on his shoulder, the bar's chatter dulling my voice. He tensed a bit but didn't move my hand away, which I took as a positive sign. Given his dark mindset, I needed to choose my words and actions carefully, feeling like I was treading on a minefield.

"Then drink with me," he said, gesturing toward the bartender. I bit my lip and dropped my hand, a move he quickly noticed. His gaze turned cold as he looked at me.

"I don't want to," I replied softly, feeling small and defeated. Although I felt powerless against him, I pressed on, trying to draw him out of the shadows.