Never Have I Ever

Thirty-Second Shot

Calix

Is this what they call love? It must be.

The concept of the four-lettered cursed word was something very unfamiliar to someone like me. Although lust is easy to comprehend, love was never in the cards for Calix Quentin Wright. Apart from how my parent's marriage was nothing but a sham, no one really made me see what it was like to harbour such emotion for another person.

I even once believed that I'd leave this world fucking every single person I see but having no idea what it was like to have genuine feelings for someone. Or so I thought.

Initially, I was merely interested in Karina about her peculiar actions then that curiosity turned into an insatiable thirst for her. Even I thought that it'd only go as far as simply 'liking' someone and nothing beyond that.

But right now, as I hold her in my arms as we watch the night sky, a part of me was certain that this was love. Despite having no prior experience with it, I just know that this was it. Maybe, my busybody therapist, Eros was right when he once advised on how to know if you love someone.

"You'll just know when it happens, Calix and there's nothing you can do to stop it." I don't think anything could possibly put a halt to what I'm feeling for her.

"You tired, dove?" I asked Karina while she was laying at my side and scratching her eyes. After staying for hours under the night sky where there was a glass wall above us, she must be feeling the exhaustion already.

I bet she had a long week but she still managed to pull off something like this for my sake. Have I finally been blessed with good fortune? But damn, I must be a lucky jackass to have her with me right now.

She nodded and grumbled a bit in a whisper with the fatigue showing in her tone along with a yawn.

"Then, let's go home," I moved slowly and tried to stand up with her in my arms in the gentlest way possible. She instantly dozed off in my arms by leaning on my chest like it was her usual spot while one of my arms was under her legs and the other was supporting her back.

When we reached the car, Dane opened the door and he helped me place Karina's head on top of my lap without disrupting her slumber. She was hugging the stuffed bear that she got earlier all throughout our drive back to the apartment. Oh god, I hope I don't end up getting jealous over a plushie.

During the ride home, last night to today's events flashed at the back of my head like a film reel. Although it was rare for me to drink until I get really emotional, yesterday was definitely the best time for me to crumble into pieces.

To be blunt, I don't even know how I got to her place in one piece but it must have been out of instinct. But I do recall every single detail I did once I reached her front door. It was embarrassing, to say the least.

I also can't believe that I managed to give her a glimpse of my past that I wanted to bury in the ground. It would have been best if she wasn't aware of it but being with Karina was like having a lie detector strapped around my heart so I can't afford to spout out a single word of deceit. She makes me weak and even if I'm supposed to hate that most in the world, I can't seem to detest it.

Nevertheless, the best reward from it all would be having to spend this day with her. I was right from the start. Fridays really are my favourite time of the week.

Going to the arcade with her, playing games like kids, eating Mcdonalds and watching the stars were mundane things for most people but they meant the world to me. Ironically enough for an heir to a billion-dollar fortune, I never experienced a moment where I was truly happy. Of course, this was my reality until she came into the picture. She really was my dove. The dove that showed me hope even after a great storm.