Burning Bridges

Chapter 12

"So let's start from the beginning," Ember offered as we sat on the couch in the living room. He had just ordered the pizza, while I sat comfortably. I can't believe I was going to confess some things to him, but I feel like I can't keep it in anymore. I have grown up my whole life keeping things to myself because no one has ever asked me if I was okay. They never wanted to know how I was doing. They never wanted to know who I was as a real person.

So I shut them out. But maybe Ember is different. Some part of me wants to tell him everything. Maybe it's because I've been lonely for so long. Or maybe it's because he cares for me. God, I'm so going to regret this, but just like everything else in my life, fuck it.

"Since we're going back to the start," I began after a deep breath, "I have always lived in poor neighborhoods. My father left me with my abusive mother for who knows why, so I was forced to grow up from a young age. I would steal food, attack people, even sleep on buses to keep myself alive. That's when I met a member of The Snakes who took me in when I was sixteen. He was fascinated with how I managed to stay alive all of these years after looking at the excuse of a home I lived in. And the story goes on from there."

"You were just a little fucking kid," Ember muttered.

"I had no choice. No other family members. No friends. Hell, I didn't even finish my junior year. But as I joined the gang, things didn't turn out as great as I thought. I thought it was my escape from my terrible childhood, but it killed me instead, well a part of me on the inside. These kinds of people are toxic with each other. They gaslight you into thinking you have to be better than everyone else. They make you think violence is the answer. I fucking hate them."

"Is that why you ran?" Oh shit, that's right. He thinks I left on purpose. Hell, I should have. But I couldn't lie to his face anymore like that, so I just nodded. He couldn't know the truth, and I almost spewed it out on him.

"As you can probably tell, I don't share these types of things. It makes me uneasy when people can use my words against me because it's like I caused that issue myself. You know? I don't even know why I'm telling you, but I'm stressed the fuck out and feel like I can tru-"

"Breathe," he cut me off to say. I was fucking rambling to the enemy. My deep breaths were initiated by the warmth of his hands on my arms. "It's going to be okay."

"But it fucking isn't, Ember! This is our reality! We don't get second chances! We have to kill to survive! Don't you ever wonder what a life outside of this would be like?!"

"Of course, I do," he started in a soft tone. "I used to think about it every day, but things can change, Raven. Things get better with time. You just have to hold on a bit longer."

"You called me Raven. You never do that."

"I-"

"Call me Violet."

"What?"

"That's my real name. Violet Santiago."

"Call me Jaden."

"What?"

"That's my real name. Jaden Soren."

"Jaden, I like that name. Why do they call you Ember then?" I was glad for a change in topic.

"Because I was the reason we lost half of our shipment when I was first initiated into the gang a couple of years ago. I was smoking and next thing I know, fire was everywhere."

"Really? I thought you were just hot-headed," I lightly teased. "They call me Raven because it was a nickname my gang gave me a while back. It's because I'm just sooo strong and dark in the night that I'm hidden."

"We really are opposites, huh? I cause bright fires and you stay in the dark."

"But don't opposites attract?"

"...Why do you think I took care of you when you came into our territory?"

"Because-"

Ring

"That's probably the pizza," Jaden mumbled while staring intently at me.

"I'll go get it," I answered back, so that I could catch my breath. I don't know what the hell just happened, but I kind of liked it. I felt like I could trust someone for once. As I opened the door, the delivery man was not what I expected him to look like. Dark clothes, piercings, tattoos. But as he opened the pizza box, I understood why.

"We start soon," the man grumbled as I took sight at the black glock in the box next to the pizza. Shit. In a hurry, I took the box from the man and shut the door. This was really happening.

"Is everything okay?" Jaden asked me from the living room. I couldn't lie to him again. Not anymore.

"No matter what happens, can I count on you to be there for me?" He nodded in return just like I did. Which makes me think, maybe the both of us were lying about our promises.