Never Really Over

chapter 6

Ben's pov.

"I'll grab us another drink" I said to the boys, getting up off the sofa and heading to the kitchen.

I was going to get them a drink but I was secretly using it as an excuse to check on Olivia since she was in there with sasha.

I could hear them talking as I walked down the hallway, I reached the door  and  heard her say something I thought she would never say.

"We kissed"

I knew she meant mason.

"You and mason did what?" I spoke.

Sasha's eyes went wide to find me standing there. A few seconds later Olivia turned round the look of shock on her face.

"Ben..." She began.

"Why would you do that?"

"Why would I do that?" She scoffed. "It was only a kiss"

"He's my mate Liv"

"And I was your girlfriend" she shot back. "But that didn't stop you from jumping into bed with that amber girl every night, did it?"

"I've already said I'm sorry for that" i spoke softly.

"I think I'll leave you both to it" Sasha said, getting up from her seat.

She gave Olivia a quick hug whispering into her ear then slid past me into the living room.

"Sorry isn't good enough" Olivia spoke. "Sorry won't make my heart stop fucking hurting"

I gulped. "I honestly never meant to hurt you"

"But you still did" tears had filled her eyes. "You still went and did it Ben and nothing can change that. It's my heart that broke every day when I read it in the paper and it's my heart that broke even more when you told me everything" she jab ed a finger into her own chest after each sentence.

"I don't know how I can make it up to you" i reached out to touch her arm but she shoved me away.

"Nothing could" a tear slid down her cheek.

Why did i have to be such an idiot and throw away a good thing with Olivia for a holiday fling?

"I'm willing to try..." I trailed off.

"Whatever Ben" she shrugged. "But don't you dare come at me for kissing mason!"

"I won't. I'm sorry I kind of got mad about it" I held my hands up.

She slid off her seat to go back into everyone.

"I still love you" I spoke to her back.

"I know you do but right now I need time. It's my heart that's broken and it's my head it's all over the place" she spoke without turning around. "And a simple sorry isn't going to fix that"

She left the kitchen leaving me standing there looking and feeling like a right fool.

Why did I have to be the one to hurt her?

I wanted to fix it with her but somehow I'm getting the feeling that I will never be able to hold her in my arms again like I used too.

Why did I have the feeling that mason could be the one to make everything better for her?

I sighed and grabbed the beers from the fridge and made my way back to the living room.