I am Different...and that is okay.

Things I Wish You Knew

There are always things you wish to say to people. Most of the time, you'll refrain from doing so because you know that the things you want to say, and the things you should say are quite different. These are some of the things I've wanted to say to him.

1.) Stop being so freaking annoyed by everything. If someone gives you the least bit of attitude, you go all "Queen Bee" and get all annoyed and pissed off because someone's dumb actions threw your whole day off kilter. Bro just get a life and quit being so annoyed by everyone else's businesses. You're better than thus.

2.) You are brilliant. Stop thinking that you're dumb. I observe you and your actions and personality, and I know you're quite smart, dare I say selective college smart. You just don't see this in yourself for some reason, and have gotten real lazy over the past few years. I'm not one to judge people, but I just see so much in you-so much greatness and virtue, it's something I look up to, and I don't want to be disappointed. If you don't believe in yourself, at least know that I believe in you. Even when everyone around you has lost all hope, know that I'm still here, believing in you.

3.) I actually love you quite a lot. I'm sure you're aware of this, as I've told you countless times, but seriously. You do so much for me, and I don't really know how else to thank you but by just really loving you, a lot. Thanks for everything you do for me bud, don't think that anything goes underappreciated. You've been one of my best and most favorite friends I've ever had. You kind of showed me how the world works a little, which will be great when I have to go out there on my own.

4.) Ok, deep, dark secret. There have been a few times where I will just catch your eyes, for like a split second, and then I will sometimes not be able to look away. Gosh dangit you have such beautiful eyes that sometimes I just forget who you are and who I am and become completely mesmerized. Like, sometimes I want to just stare into your eyes all day, but that would be kind of weird for the both of us, so, if you've ever noticed, I try to refrain from looking directly into your eyes when talking to you. It's a weird sentiment but it's true. Sometimes though I just can't help but to look into your handsome eyes...

5.) You annoy the *beep* out of me. A lot, actually. There have  been times where I've told my friends that I've wanted to punch you in the face (good thing I'm in love with your eyes, or else you might not even have any.)  or at one point I think I just wanted to drop a nuclear bomb on your head. Yep, those were the words exactly from the text. In all honesty, the closer a friend is to me, the more they get on my nerves...sometimes I just want to physically take it out on you though...haha...

6.) You're my role model. Okay, to be rash here, you're my role model with all things music. I strive to be just as great as you, because I want people to look at me dumbfounded and say "What?! She plays viola AND flute, clarinet, violin, piano, guitar, brass, and percussion? And she's good at all of them too? What can't she do?!" I want to be good at music theory and composition, and be so great on viola that the underclassmen secretly talk about how "I'm Jesus Christ" on viola and whatnot. You just have so much knowledge in the music world, and you're just so great, I want to be just like that.

So yes, there are so many things I wish you could know. Some more secretive than others. I just hope that perhaps one day you'll hear these words from me directly, and that you'd agree with me, mostly. If there's one thing though, that I hope you do know, is that you are constantly, and everlastingly amazing me, every day. You are such a unique character, and I wish more people in this world were like you.