I am Different...and that is okay.

Something I Really Don't Get

What's wrong with me?

Oh, who am I kidding, there's lots of things wrong with me.

But seriously.

I don't intend for this to be a rant about boys, however, it certainly might turn out to be one.

I don' think I'm the only person going through this, as a girl. At least I hope I'm not.

What I'm trying to decipher here, is why I'm the ONLY GIRL IN THE WHOLE FRICKEN SCHOOL who doesn't have a boyfriend?

Okay, let's set some things straight first.

I'm not IN DEEP SEARCH for a boyrfriend. I know that I can be perfectly happy by myself. I'm not THAT desperate, to be honest.

AND because of how I stated that I wasn't (hopefully) the only person who goes through this, my argument about girl besides me having a boyfriend is COMPLETELY invalid, I know.

But it just FEELS that way, okay?!

I'm not gonna change who I am or tear myself up over this just because of one thing that's missing from my life, but I'm not uber-happy to realize this either.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?!

In my head, and around my friends, I'm not even a human, but towards the general population, I am, in fact, 100% normal.

I actually have to TRY to be normal, and lemme tell ya it ain't easy.

Wow. I sounded like I was from the south.

LOL I'm not.

OKAY. ANYWAYS. I can't help but just wonder, what is so unattractive about me that scares off all the boys? Or at least, all the descent boys?

Because ya know, if there's something that needs to be improved upon, I would strive to become better in that specfied area!

If a guy likes me, he's usually a MAJOR nerd. What am I? Some NERD magnet? Are they going for me because they're trying to find stupid girls to prove their superior intellect to?

LOL that's not the case with me. I'm an AP honor roll student with a bright future ahead of me. Anything those nerd say, can and WILL be used against them, because I IZ AKSHULLY SMART. Booh-yah!

So it's probably not the fact that I'm stupid, because I'm not. I wouldn't even want to be with a guy who doesn't presidate intellect over stupidity.

So then, I started thinking, is it because I don't have anything in common with them?

If being a smart student that plays multiple instruments, loves si-fi, AND participates in TWO sports is uncommon, then PLEASE let me know.

I literally have an interest in any subject a guy would have interest in. Academics, (okay, maybe not an interest) Music, sports, and technology!

Perhaps I don't sit at home and play Call of Duty all day, but that can't be a valid reason why a dude would not be interested at all in me.

And besides. I'm a BEAST at Mario Kart. I once had a streak of 26 consecutive first place wins. I've only met a few people who are better than me at this game.

Okay, so videogames isn't the answer.

Am I ugly?

Ok, so about this one. I HAVE gotten male attention before, but just not in ways that I particularly enjoyed.

Now I am fully aware that I am...how do I say this without sounding cocky?...NOT UGLY!

So obviously, I've got the body and looks that guys seem to like.

Finally, I wondered, are my standards too high?

I would have to say no to this too, because I HAVE found guys that meet my standards, (They aren't crazy high, but they ARE standards) but THEY ALL HAVE GIRLFRIENDS.

IT'S NOT FLIPPING FAIR.

I'm just a lonely young woman. I didn't understand WHY no (descent) guy ever liked me back.

I've never been on a date.

I've never been asked out, in reality.

I never had one of those pointless elementary-middle school relationships because I'VE NEVER BEEN ASKED OUT.

And needless to say, I haven't had my first kiss yet.

It's not like I beg the universe to give me a guy who would complete the checklist. It's really not like that, in all honesty.

I'm just an inquirious girl who wonders through her confusing world; wondering why things are the way they are.

Thus, the cycle of questions repeats. Again, and again.