Love Fool | YoongixMalereader | ✔

| 18 |

I open the door, I let Love walk on its own feet. I stand up against the now closed door, I let out a sigh and walk into the bathroom to take a shower. I slip out of my clothes and step into the shower, the water is ice cold at first but soon turns semi-warm, I let my hands get in contact with the shampoo and start to massage my hair and scrub my body. I do not care about using shower gel, shampoo for my body is enough for me. 

I step out of the shower and try to semi-dry my hair when I hear the phone ringing. I quickly hear something fall onto the floor and a voice flows around the apartment. I step out of the bathroom and step closer to the phone. I see Love on the shelf that is right next to where the phone hangs. The part of the phone you hold in your hands is on the floor "Hello?" I hear a voice from the phone, not thinking about it I pick it up and place it on my ear "Hello?" I hear the voice say again, and I freeze. 

It is Namjoon. "M/N are you there?" I stutter as I try to speak "Nam-Namjoon?" It comes out as a question and not an answer. "Hey... How are you?", "I-I am fine, what about you?" Namjoon sighs as he answers: "I am fine" He stops almost as if he is trying to say something more than that. I somehow gain the braveness to ask: "Why are you calling Namjoon?" He sighs yet again "Sorry... Sorry, I just, I am with Yoongi and he is not the same anymore. Please talk to him" Not the same anymore? Talk to him? Why is not calling me instead of Namjoon? I never get to say anything when the phone is taken from Namjoon, and a drunk yet broken voice says: "M/N... Is it you?" It is a drunk Yoongi. "Please say something..." He is so drunk "Talk to me..." Talk to you? "Why would I talk to you first? I wanted you in my life, in my dream but you... But you choose to break up not me. Now you want me to talk to you?? How about you call me, and not get Namjoon to call me?" A voice crack leaves Yoongi's throat "I- M/N I just-..." He stops what he tries to say. I stay silent, and the more silent I stay the more I feel my anger build up on the inside. I wait for minutes but he says nothing "I am sad that you have to get Namjoon to call me before you can talk to me. I have waited for days upon days for you to contact me, and the only thing I get is silence. If you are going to stay silent, do not call me. Then I would rather you not contact me. Bye Yoongi" I hang up and put the phone where it is supposed to be. I look at Love and sigh, I hate this feeling of guilt because I speak my feelings... 

The next morning I woke up with a settling feeling, last night's call really made me have trouble sleeping. I sit around most of the morning waiting for Yoongi to call, but when lunch comes around nothing happens. So I sit there and wait for him to call, but dinner comes around and nothing happens. I find myself waiting for him to call, but night comes around and yet he has not called me. I wasted my time, I wasted my time on a man who can not call me. A man who wants me to talk to him, and not him talking to me. He wants me to call when I am the one who gave him a letter that said that I am the one who will be the one to wait for him to call, yet it never happens. 

I feel like a fool, I feel so dumb, stepped on and so much more... It is not fair. On one side I feel like I should walk away from the feeling of being in love with Yoongi and the whole waiting for him to come around. But on the other hand, I feel like I am stopping myself from living my youth, living my life. It is mine, not his. I end up promising myself that I give him 5 days, if no phone calls, letters or visits are made from him, I will let him go. If he comes around after 5 days it is no longer my problem, it is his. He missed his chance to make up, maybe not get back together but at least become sort of friends.

But am I making the right promise to myself?...