Let Me Burn!

Chapter XI.

Jimin tried to get past what happened.

He really did try to move on, but it was so – so difficult when everyone around you constantly reminded you of it with their sympathetic looks and constant questioning of – "Are you okay?" "How are you feeling?" When you didn't want to think about something painful, the last thing you wanted was to be asked about how it left you feeling over and over again. Sure, Jimin knew it was just people worrying and caring about him but right now, that was not what he wanted or needed. Right now, Jimin had to figure out why his life was falling apart. Things went from being great, wonderful even to this – Jimin slipped out of step again and tripped over his own feet as he panted heavily, leaning over as his hands gripped onto his knees to avoid completely falling. Staring down at the floor through slightly blurred eyes, the frustration ran through his veins like acid. Why? Why couldn't he get his body to move how he wanted. It felt like he'd never danced before in his life. Slowly lifting his head as he glared at his own reflection, looking exhausted and defeated. Something he never wanted to see. Jimin slowly moved to stand as he pushed his hair off his face, slowly walking over to the speaker as he pressed the button to stop it as he closed his eyes and curled his hand into a fist. His mind flashing back to that day where he'd made a fool of himself and proven why Omegas were mostly useless other than making pups. Jimin's jaw tightened as he gritted his teeth and he felt a spike of rage, his emotions already all over the spectrum due to his changing hormones as he smacked his hand against the glass without thinking. Hearing the crack of the glass before pain followed, Jimin hissed as he looked and his eyes widened when he saw his arm bleeding, a piece of glass having jabbed into it deeply.

The pain was awful, but Jimin couldn't be compelled by it to move, staring as his blood ran down the glass slowly and he felt himself overcome as his legs gave out. Falling to the floor as he rested against that same mirror, curling into himself as he closed his eyes tightly and let out a sob. His mind repeating 'why' over and over as if somehow it could find the answer. Jimin pushed his hands against his head and gripped tightly at his hair as he ignored the feeling of something warm and wet running down his arm. Hearing the voices of those girls again – the echoing of their laughter and anyone else's that saw that video, was there that day. He was a joke. There was no way he could do this. After cleaning up the mirror and texting Hoseok to let him know he would pay for the repair without saying much else despite Hoseok's worried string of questions, he headed 'home'. Having wrapped his arm and hid it under the sleeve of his hoodie as he slowly pushed the door to his apartment open. Jimin hadn't gone over to Jungkook's since that incident. Honestly, he'd barely talked to anyone let alone the Alpha. Jungkook would text and call him, leave voicemails saying that he understood Jimin wanted space, but he was worried. Jimin stood in the walkway of his apartment, looking around at how cold and dark it was, and the strap of his bag slipped from between his fingers and hit the floor. Jimin looked like he was in daze as he slowly walked by an unkept kitchen and living room, trash bags piled up, dishes in the sink. Jimin just couldn't be bothered to care about his well being right now. He barely ate or drank and knew it wasn't fair to the baby, but he just couldn't. All of this happened because he thought it was okay to be happy. Because he was a fat pig. Jimin fell face first onto his hard, uncomfortable mattress and slowly turned his head to the side as he stared into the darkness of the room. Listening to the sounds of the city through his window despite it being closed. It was always warm and quiet at Jungkook's place. Jimin slowly let his eyes slip closed, about to give in to exhaustion and sleep until a knock came to his door, startling him awake. Jimin had planned to ignore the person, it was probably Seokjin, Hoseok or even Taehyung trying to coax him out and let them take care of him, but Jimin didn't want to be taken care of. He wanted to be left alone. Another knock before the last voice he wanted to hear right now came through –