My Mother's Husband

Chapter 131

MAY’S P.O.V

The bitch is back.

Well, I’m not entirely back, I’m sort of laying on the bathroom floor crying my eyes out... but at least I’m me again.

Hope. She’s never going to forgive me. I know how her mind works, she’s the most loyal person I’ve ever met, the person that sees the good in everyone around her, but that just means it crushes her that much more when that loyalty isn't returned.

When Craig was dragging her away, she was still crying out for me, but that won't last long. When she lets it settle in, truly settle in, that I was willing to use the worst moment of her life against her, hurt her in a way only a best friend can hurt you, she'll leave and never look back.

Trust is a funny thing, love too. It can take a lifetime to build, but only a second to destroy.

And I fucking destroyed her.

My tears won’t stop falling. I held it together out there with him, put on a good act, told him I needed sleep. Then came in here, laid down, and haven’t been able to move since.

I feel stronger now yet weaker, is that weird? I can’t explain it, like I know I could hold a gun to his thick-skulled head now, but without her I wouldn’t know where to look for the bullets. She is my other half, my soul mate, him taking her from me is what snapped me out of this, but it doesn’t change that she’s gone.

There’s a strength in admitting you’ve been weak, there’s no shame in admitting that you fell into a trap set for someone just like you.

I fell into his trap. Now I need to make him fall into mine.

Hurt people, hurt people – and I’m very fucking hurt.

He has to die. He just has to. Nobody else will keep me here; Antonio wants me to leave, Elba would find a way to understand, Angelo is practically willing to pay for my fucking ticket, it’s just him. Without him, I’m free.

I learned a long time ago that I can’t take a life without consequences, however I’m pretty sure I could stand back and watch someone else do it.

I have to get to this ball.

“Farfalla, are you almost ready?” I turned the shower on when I came in here, he can’t know I’ve been crying like this or the whole plan goes to shit. He truly needs to believe that I picked him, that’s how I get his guard down.

“One more minute! Just shaving my cunt!” His chuckle from the other side of the door makes me want to dig my teeth into his throat and rip out his jugular. How dare he have any fucking joy, how fucking dare he! Does he know what she’s going through right now? Because of him? Fuck him.

“You are quite the wordsmith, Belle.” Oh you want a rhyme? I’ll give you a rhyme.

Mary had a little lamb, a little lamb, Mary had a little lamb and... his name was Jordano and he got his throat slit!

Beautiful, I think I’ll get it published.

I push my face straight under the ice-cold stream, wiping away any evidence that I’ve been sobbing my heart out laying on the bathroom floor for the last hour. It helps wake me up too, the shakes are getting out of control and all I want to do is throw my guts up.

I need to get that bottle from Rosa, she said it wouldn’t be nice but I need all this crap out of my system. He can’t have any control over me, the way he gets inside my head, the things he makes me think... I can’t explain to you how he does it.

He might be the smartest person I’ve ever met, terrifyingly intelligent. He has the ability to know exactly what you need to hear, exactly how to use your every weakness against you.