The Hunt: A Jesperi Kotkaniemi Fanfiction

12. Sascha

Jesperi is leaving today.

It's still three in the morning, I haven't had enough sleep in the past few days ever since I ended things with him. I like him a lot, but it's just the situation that scares me-- giving me anxiety. And especially, knowing that I haven't healed myself yet from what happened to me in the past.

I also remembered how Trina managed to warn me before not to date a pro-hockey guy because life will totally not gonna be easy. The constant travel, being far away from you is a burden and I'm sure as hell that I am not that type of a girl. I have major trust issues now, and being in a long distance relationship won't ever work on me because I'll just end up overthinking every day. It's torture!

I picked up my phone and started typing a text goodbye to Jesperi. Or maybe just a little have a safe flight message to him.

"Urghh!!!" I groaned throwing my phone away. There's no way you can do that Sascha! I groaned again covering my whole face with my pillow trying to sleep back up again.

I'm going to miss that man for sure! He made my stay here in Finland wild and happy somehow. I know I'm stupid enough to end things with him when literally I can just go travel from Ohio down to Raleigh if I miss him since I'll be coming back to US in a few weeks to go back to school again. But I just want to be fair to him anyway, if I want to have a relationship with Jesperi. I just need to fix myself.

Bzzzt... Bzzzt... Bzzzt...

What the hell! It's literally three a.m.! I just almost got asleep! I groaned again reaching for my phone still closing my eyes, I swipe to answer it.

"Hmmm!!" I said, surely this is Trina.

"Sascha?"

"Shit!" I cursed shooting myself into sitting position. Fvck! It's Jesperi.

"Oh! Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I--"

"Oh no, no. No you didn't! I was just surprised and I thought it's Trina calling."

"Did I woke you up?" He says slowly.

"I can't sleep." I replied and silence took over.  I cleared my throat. "So, I'm assuming you have an early flight today?"

I heard him sigh. "Yeah."

It's my turn to sigh. "Keep safe you there!"

"Thanks. But yeah, about that. I actually called to ask you one last time Sascha, if it's okay."

"What is it?"

"Can I drop by and say goodbye?"

I cursed myself for the thing that I'm about to do, however, this is now or never! I don't want to wake up one day regretting that I didn't do anything to make my last moments with Kk memorable-- a happy memory.

"I mean, I can just drive you to the airport if you want to." I said biting my nails waiting for him to say yes.

"Are you sure?"

"If you want to, why not."

"Okay, I'll wait." He says.

Right after I hang up, I fastly changed into my jeans and hoody. Grabbed my shoes and key, for sure my grandparents are wondering where I'm going very early in the morning if ever they heard me closing the main doors, start the car's engine and drove away.

When I arrived at Kk's house he is already outside his cottage next to his two huge luggages waiting for me. My heart starts to ache at the sight of him. I hop out of the car and gave him a quick smile.