for a day i cheat, for a night i sleep

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Cold midnights
Superficial
Not inside
I wish to feel something
To be alive
And not just a doll
Made of soil
I have a mind

I might not seem like
Someone who hates to smile
Scared of a hello
A body that is too vile
Tainted beyond restoration
Feelings fragile

Yet I have a heart that beats
Mouth that screams
"Forget your mistakes
And for once just breathe."
I want to feel whole
Like i was before it all fell off

I just want to sleep
And dream
Not wake up to nothing
Sheer emptiness petrifies me
In a night of vulnerability
I never thought I would wish for company
Someone to hold me
Someone to build me high
Like a tower
To give their 24 hour

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