He's Fire and She's Playing with It - Mafia Version

Chapter 33: Little Do You know

TW: SELF HARM.

Three weeks of feeling absolutely nothing, made Ally question the beauty of it. Was it good for her? Should she at least try to get back to her old self? Was there even an old self to get back to? She wasn't sure she had anyone to return to. The girl she had been before the turn of events could've died. Maybe she wasn't locked in somewhere, maybe she was buried deep down under moist soil, nothing but bones and teeth left.

She picked up a knife and sat down on the kitchen floor. She carefully pushed the shiny steel blade to her wrist. The broad side of the knife felt cold against her skin. She wasn't scared, didn't fear the pain or the danger, only curious to see if it might wake her up. She turned the blade over and quickly ran it down her forearm. A sharp pain and then a burning sensation. The blood took control of the wound, slowly filling it to the brim. It overflooded and sent blood dripping down her arm and onto the floor. She raised her wrist to the height of her face and watched the vertical wound. It wasn't deep enough to create a risk of bleeding out, and she didn't think it didn't require stitches.

A feeling grew in her stomach. Disappointment. She wished the pain had lasted longer. Her mind didn't want to let her feelings in, but her body ached for any kind of emotion. It wasn't built for the kind of walking ghost that she had become.

She rose to her feet and put the knife in the sink, before reaching for a towel to wipe the floor clean of blood.

∞

Ally opened the door. Adryan shot her a flashing smile. He was dressed in a grey coat and scarf. October had arrived, brutally colder than normal.

"You and Benjamin certainly have issues with announcing your arrival", she said and stepped aside, letting him into the flat.

He brushed past her. "I've received an invitation for a party. We should attend."

She shrugged and crossed the room to sit down on the floor and continue her puzzle. The pieces were spread out on the living room table, some of them connected into a picture of Starry Night.

"Whatever you say."

He missed her fighting spirit. He sat down next to her, still wearing his coat. The scarf he stuffed into his pocket.

"We don't have to go. We could take a stroll somewhere."

She raised her eyebrows and gave him a look full of doubt. "A stroll? You're not followed by paparazzi, at least you haven't been whenever we have gone out."

The corner of his mouth tugged. "No, but the stroll could lead somewhere. A coffee place, a restaurant, a bar. Somewhere where I will be recognised."

"An establishment of a friend who you're not friendly with." She didn't wait for him to confirm her saying. "Let's go to the party."

Even though he didn't sense any excitement in her voice, her answer still made him slightly less unhappy. She hadn't chosen the easiest alternative. They could've gone to dinner. For a drink. A coffee. Instead, she was ready to let him escort her to a social gathering.

"We can stay as long, or as short as you want", he promised. "We'll make an appearance, take a drink, and then we can sneak out the backdoor."

"As if we're going for a rendezvous?" Her eyebrows shot up again, a challenging tone hidden in the words.

He leaned back, resting his back against the sofa, and shot her a smile. "Fake it till you make it, love."

She didn't look at him as she reached for a puzzle piece, her college sweater creeping up her arm as she extended it. He thought he saw something underneath it. A white cloth or something like that, but as she pulled the arm back and put the piece into place, he had forgotten all about it.