Two Steps Behind

Part 21

 "Oh my god..." Angie sighed the next day at work, leaning on the counter, her chin resting in her hand. "He just kissed you?"

"Well, I'm not sure who kissed who, honestly," Elizabeth admitted. "It just kind of happened. We both started apologizing and it was very confusing for a minute. I was freaking out. I thought I had ruined everything. I kind of yelled at him that I am in love with him."

"You yelled at him?"

"Yeah, I mean, it was a very intense moment," she snapped in defense of herself. "He was dancing with me to this song that he said was our song and he said all these wonderful things about how perfect I was and then we were kissing. I thought I had just made this huge mistake and I was going to lose him too, and I couldn't bear that thought. My life is so messed up right now and sometimes I feel like he's the only good thing I have left. He kept asking me if I wanted to kiss him. I tried not to answer. I told him we should just forget it but he wouldn't let up. I just kind of lost my mind and I yelled at him about how I've been in love with him since we were fifteen."

"Jesus, what did he do?" Angie asked, her eyes wide.

"He told me he's in love with me too and has been since we were sixteen," Elizabeth replied, still having a hard time believing it was true. When she thought about how often she'd wished for it, it just seemed impossible that it finally happened. She'd been so sure she'd never get to have him the way she wanted him.

"Wow..." Angie breathed. "And you guys were at the lake? I mean, this might be the most romantic thing I have ever heard. It's like something out of a movie or a novel. I mean, you guys have been in love since you were teens, you never say anything, you marry a douchebag, you leave him and come home, and find out he's been waiting for you all this time? That's like epic love kind of shit. That's crazy."

"Well, I wouldn't say he's been waiting for me," Elizabeth countered as she grabbed the broom and swept the floor. "I mean, he was engaged at one point. So, clearly he had moved on from me."

"Yeah, but it didn't work out."

"Only because she cheated on him. If she hadn't done that, I could have come home to find him married, possibly with kids or something, and none of this would have happened."

"That's what I'm saying!" Angie exclaimed, grabbing the garbage and lifting it out, tying up the top. "It's like you two were fated from the beginning. Like, maybe because you were always meant to be, that relationship was destined to fail. Maybe that's why your marriage failed too! Because you were with the wrong person the whole time."

"I mean, that's a nice thought, I guess," Elizabeth shrugged. "But I think the fates could have come up with something a little less hellish for me if it was all just so I would end up with Eddie in the end."

"Yeah, sorry. That might have been a little insensitive of me. I didn't mean you were destined to go through what you've been through. Nobody is destined for that shit. I just, I had a feeling you two were more than friends, but I had no idea how much more."

"Clearly, neither did I," Elizabeth laughed. "I have thought about it so many times since last night. My mind had been completely obsessed with it. Moments when I could have changed everything if I would've spoken up. I'd give anything to go back and change everything, to be with Eddie from the beginning. When I think of all the wasted time...the unnecessary pain...but Eddie said we can't change the past, just move on from this moment together and enjoy it."

"Sounds like a smart man," Angie agreed with a nod. "Be right back."

Angie headed out back to toss the garbage in the dumpster and Elizabeth finished sweeping up the cafe. Maybe Eddie was right. Maybe she needed to stop beating herself up about the what ifs and the could have beens. It was all said and done now, there was no way to change any of it. But damn if the image of her hand in Eddie's, running out of that church and away from the nightmare that would become her life, didn't fill her with joy. But now she could take his hand and run into happiness and away from despair, into a future with him that could be full of love and light, and that would have to be enough.