The Cure

The Speech:

Gwen:

David is screaming. I know that much. So many things are wrong right now. I don't understand why this always happens to me. Maybe if I just died it would all be better. I could just forget. I wouldn't even need to remember I wouldn't need to exist.

"Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe. Gwen! GWEN! BREATHE! PLEASE CALM DOWN I NEED YOU!" He's screeching in my face now, his orotund voice becoming hoarse and gruff. I believe I replied something but has yet to register in my own body, all I know is that he starts to cry then. I am immensely tired. I do not feel in my own body, I am not my own person. His voice is disembodied, I no longer feel real. I am simply going through the motions in life, what am I doing here. I don't belong, I have no purpose.

David and his insistent howling is being seen but not being processed on my brain. I feel as if I am floating, am I flying? I look at the cerulean blue of his eyes and realize that I wish to fly. I can feel the wings on back extend and stretch behind me. I close my eyes and fall asleep to beating wings and the river of rain coming out of David's eyes.

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Lightning streaks across the dark sky. I keep going, I can hear the tinkling of chimes and the plucking of an acoustic guitar. The way it is played the sensation coming from the vibrating strings sounds awfully familiar, but there is something that's off about it. It is not exactly what I want it to be. I can feel it, coming from the other end of the horizon. I can feel the lyrics flow down from the clouds above."I can make it, I know I can."

 

I beat my wings faster, I need to get there soon I'm not sure why but something inside my feels desperate about it. Its warmth. Its tone. Its familiar melody. Then it hits me, why the chords reach deep inside and twist and stretch my soul beneath its tendrils, composed of pure starlight. "Derek," the back of my mind whispers into the abyss. I feel complete with his melodies inside me-

Something is wrong. Something is not right. That note was wrong. "Ok, Gwen this next one is gonna harmonize with what you're playing. Play G flat, then B, G flat again and C. It's a little different then the first repetition."

 The song has changed, it is too fast paced. Too staccato, too many changing notes, it is not right it is not- it is not Derek playing now. My mind knows something is wrong now.

Lightning descends upon me, it lights up the sky above and strikes my wings. I cry out and my right wing fails me. I can feel the oncoming descent. Terror rips through me, the clouds have gone dark, it begins to pour. I realize it was not a happy dream at all. The scenery has changed.

The wall. No, not the wall please not the wall. Not again. I can feel the pain ripping through my legs, the strain on my arms. I can feel the oncoming rush of water. I try so hard to clench my hands. To will myself to wake up. It does not work. I take a different tactic instead. My brain sends a message to my hand, forcing the nails to drag into my opposite arm's wrist.

I wake up in a rush of breath of tears and blood. David sits before me with Derek's guitar in his hands. I stare at it. I stare at the blood ebbing from my wrist. Stare at Davids shocked face. And I stare at the clouds painting on my ceiling. "What did I say to you? I know I was kinda out of it but... it didn't register- I didn't hurt you did I? Nothing hurtful?"