The Stains of the Crown

Chapter Six

Trigger warnings: PTSD dreams, talks about abuse, talks about trauma.

Two weeks later, Princess Jovianne takes me on another run. We don't talk until about half an hour in. She sits down before turning towards me.

'Something strange happened when you shifted.'

'What do you mean?'

'Well, you didn't just shift straight into a fox.'

'Explain.' She huffs.

'You shifted into at least six other animals before finally settling on the fox.'

'How is that even possible?' I ask, playing oblivious.

'I don't know, but I was thinking... if you could shift into different animals then, you should be able to do it now.' I hum, shifting nervously. 'What is it?'

'Nothing.' Before she can respond, I think of a wolf. I whine as my bones move throughout my body. Once the pain stops, I look down at myself. My wolf had more red than my fox, but there was still more black than red.

'Your wolf is beautiful.'

'Bet I can outrun you now,' I tease. I take off running and she chases after me, trying her best to catch up. Still, I was faster and could run for longer. We end up stopping by a small stream. It trickles softly. We collapse on the edge, both of us panting. I sit there for a while, watching my reflection in the water.

'What's on your mind?' I sigh.

'I don't want to talk about it.' She hums, staring down at me. I look around, trying to find anything to focus on but the way she stares. The information she wanted was information I wasn't ready to give. I had a lot of secrets from her still, and I didn't want to share most of them. Not yet.

'Why do you hide so many things from me?' I stand, shifting back to my human form. I was glad she'd decided to let us go without guards. She shifts too, and I try not to stare.

"It's not about you," I say, sitting back down with my feet in the stream. I put one hand into the water. I watch the way it practically dances around my fingertips. It was cold. Of course it was. Summer was turning into fall now.

"Then what's it about?" she asks softly, probably wondering why I hadn't said anything else.

"There's a lot I don't talk about. Things even Delilah doesn't know. Delilah knows about this one, but she's still the only person I've told." She hums, staring at me. I sigh before turning towards her. "My father liked to gossip. I heard him talking to my mother once about her sister, my aunt. He was saying how my aunt deserved all the bad things in her life because she didn't shift like normal. I asked my mother what he meant after he left to drink. She told me that my aunt could shift into anything she wanted. She could change her face, her body, her voice, everything. At least until my aunt had a baby. I'd never met my aunt, and my mother never told me what happened to her or her baby, so I don't know anything except that."

It's quiet for a long time. The stream still trickles, and in the distance I can hear an owl, but the world seems muted, dull. I shake the water off my hands and stand up.

"Why didn't you want to tell me that?"

"Because he thought my aunt deserved whatever happened to her for something I can probably do, too." She sighs and walks over to me. She grabs my shoulders softly.

"She didn't, and you didn't deserve any of the bad things that have happened to you." I step back, looking away.

"You don't know everything."