Falling Apart

c h a p t e r t h r e e

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I have multiple desires, many which are not realistic and not possibly something I would ever achieve. Some are dramatically wrong and not to my type of lifestyle.

But this... this is where apart of me breaks. Falls apart. Shatters into one million different pieces. Yet mends me in all the other areas of my life. 

It makes me realise that love is real, love is so incredibly amazing and I get experience it in moments like these. Moments were I have the privilege of sharing a bed with the love of my life, cooking food in our kitchen together, going on small dates every now and then.

Moments like these... are what make me want to live.

I slam my book close, feeling a sting in my heart as I read every one of those words. Knowing I will never get to experience that kind of love. Appreciate that kind of love. Live that love.

My body aches, my mind grows painful. I fall onto my bed, back first, feeling a sense of relief that I was able to escape them. I hate that family, everyone in it. Apart from Luca... why do I have to be so unlucky.

The slam of my bedroom door makes my attention fall to it. Aubrey walks in, sitting besides me, both of us falling back down on the bed, relaxing. She turns her head, looking straight at me with a smile.

"I found out Luca is not biologically related to any of them. He was adopted when he was seven, which mean I might actually have a chance. Only he is most definitely not my type"Aubrey says.

I sigh. That is why I could to marry him, because he is not apart of the royal family biologically.

"Are you ok? I heard you yell outside, but I tried my best to distract everyone" I turn my head, looking back up at the ceiling.

"There is no way Elias has a heart I could find. I am not sure he even has one" I turn to look back at her again. "He does not want anything to do with love. He is doing this for the throne and only the throne. Believe me Aubrey... he is so much more your type" I speak in a low voice.

"Give him a chance. Do not be angry at him, just be yourself. If he doesn't like it, he will be the one to suffer, not you. He will get what he deserves" I nod my head at her comment. She is right, I just need to be myself.

"His parents left. Luca and Elias are still here, somewhere. But their parents left for England again" I furrow my eyebrows, "What?"

She nods her head in agreement to my disbelief. "Why would they do that? The wedding is next week"

"They don't care. They just wanted their son to be King. Left Luca here with us, not that we are complaining"

Unbelievable. They will soon be my parents in law and they do not care!

"Are you going to the club tonight?" I ask, changing the subject.

"Not if you're not ok" I shake my head. "Go. I will be fine" 

She watches me for a moment and then smiles, getting up and walking toward the door but not before stopping when she sees the book I was reading on the floor. I prop elbow up on the bed, placing my head in my hand.

"I have read that book." She says, turning around to face me. "Read it" She has a large smirk on her face.

"Why?"

"Just read it" She walks away, leaving my room and curiosity filling me. I stand up and grab the book. I put my heels back on, walking out of my room and back outside.

Luckily nobody - Elias - Is occupying where I am, so I sit down on a bench, over-looking the garden and start reading the book.

I scream his name. The man who I am truly so excited to one day marry. To love him so passionately, just as i and he have done so already. I have shown my love towards Max, so has he to me.

By being so utterly in love. By continuing to appreciate one another and stand by each other. I really do love him. 

So as I lie here, my back arched, my hands gripping the bed sheets. I feel pleasure in every inch of my body. It feels like electricity radiating through my entire body, pleasuring me in places I never thought I could be pleased in.

His tongue swifts against my clit, making me become more wet as time goes on. Moans and screams leave my mouth, when suddenly he stops. 

He grabs both my ankles together, twisting my whole body around. I turn my head to the side so I have the ability to breathe, when a sudden screech leaves my mouth. He thrusts inside of me, hard and rough.

The bed moves with him, and my body shakes, beginning to feel the ache of my legs. I can tell now I won't be capable of standing tomorrow.

He turns my body around, making me face him. He pulls both my legs up and over his shoulders, thrusting in me once again.

I scream, loud enough that all the neighbours could hear. Max puts his hand over my mouth, then places two fingers deep in my throat, causing me to gag as he continues thrusting hard inside of me.

"Fuck!" He yells aloud

"Didn't realise you were into smut" I hear Elias say from behind me. 

I slam my book but, thawing it onto the ground and looking back at Elias who seems to have been leaning over my shoulder, reading with me.

I look away again, embarrassed that he saw that. Of course Aubrey told me to read that. She knew it was smut... only I am actually intrigued by it.

Elias sits besides me, looking at me, but I avoid eye contact. 

"Do you read those type of books all the time?" He asks, his voice deep and... attractive. Shit!

"No. Aubrey told me to read it"

"And where's Aubrey now?"

"A club. Most likely doing that exact thing to ten different men. You can join her if you want, just down the Main Street past the mall" He sighs lifting his arm behind me, laying it on the top of the bench.

"Not my type of thing. I don't cheat on the woman I am about to marry" He says. 

I sigh, keeping my eyes out at the garden. When suddenly I feel his hand gently grip onto my chin, forcing me to face him.

"I do not love you, Merliah. I never will, as I have already once established. But there is a small predicament about marriage that every couple follows through on that night" His voice grows quieter. His hand is still on my chin.

He leans in closer, our lips almost touching, when he breathes into my mouth, whispering.

"I can do those things to you, Merliah. I won't say no to that" His breathes are deep, mine are heavy.

The tension I feel in this moment surprises me. I have never once been this tense. But for some odd reason... in all the ways I never expected or wanted to be.

I am an innocent. I would never do such a thing with him... I think.

Hit me with your opinions. Any changes you want? Anything you just want to happen in the book? - Author