Daisy

11

They all left. They forced to stay but I denied it and I know they won't let me die. They are too good for me. I felt I'm dying soon.  I am sitting on my bed holding my knees closer to me as I cry and remembering all the good memories of my friends and hyunjin. That all baking with my grandmother. We didn't tell her about me, I don't want to make her worry. But she is crying knowing I'm sick and making good food for me. I'm thankful for god for giving me these peoples who I loved the most.

I saw my phone ringing but I'm ignoring it, they must love me so much

I looked at the sky full of stars and moon shining. The cold breeze coming through the window and giving me my last chills with last memories. the same breeze at night when I always went to spend late night star gazing with hyunjin. The same wind, that I always look for to take my all worries and pain with. I'm tired of pain again, I want to die.

"Please take me with you, I want to die" as I said

I heard Chan Hyung calling my name I opened my door and let Chan Hyung enter,

"Please, lixie, don't act like this there's no one like you, we all love you please don't do this lix, let's go to the hospital"

"Why don't he love me?" I said looking at the window and feeling the same wind

"Don't you see us? He is dumb to not loving you back but we are here"

"I'm worthless Hyung, I don't have reasons to live"

"Don't say that! I know you have a bad past and what happened was all bad, but don't say you are worthless. Your parents are worthless and stupid that not knowing they had an angel with them. you have to look at us Felix, you always told us, how we mean to you. You told me how you wanted a big brother to take care of you, and you see your brother in me, stay for me, for us! Your grandmother told me once, how she wanted to play with you when you were a child, how she wants to give you kisses and make food for you, but that never happened. Your parents took all her dreams and left her alone here and took you with them. She loved you the most, she finally have you Felix.. stay for her At least, there's is always have something for each person in the world, no one is unlucky Felix. It's the world's rule, if you don't have it now, you will get it in the future. If he doesn't want you then someone will. You have to stay strong. If you don't let your past die, your past won't let you live... Please live for us, all are crying please"

I saw him crying, I never saw someone crying and caring but I can't...

I felt like I'm losing my sight and feeling week, my eyes closing slowly as he holds me close to him "i d-don't think it will work h-hyung surgery takes your feelings b-but I'm afraid, I-i will fall for him a-again "

I said my last words and I finally loosened my grip on Chan hyungs shoulder and felt my pain gone as I close my eyes.. I will miss all of you