Attempting To Trust (Niall Horan Fan Fiction)

Chapter 16

Niall POV

Knowing Karla was in no condition to drive her gorgeous Mustang, which I was especially jealous of, I decided it would be in her best interest if I drove her to my place to stay for tonight. With her panic attack taking her over, I could see the headlines now, with none of them having anything positive to say. Karla was perfect in every way, but there are sleazy men out there who have to build their lives around taking pictures, with lies posted underneath them which were used to lower people's confidence and make other people feel terrible about themselves.Although I understand they have to support their families somehow, if people like them could have families, what they did was deceiving and despicable.

Lies only tear people down in the end, especially those that tell them.

When we got back to my house, I walked her into my place with my hand around her waist, keeping her as steady as I possibly could. Even though she could walk fine by herself by that time, she did not move my hand like she normally would. Although I am more of a cozy, touchy kind of person, she showed her affection in other ways. It's not that either way is better than the other, but there was something about her that pushed away my touch. Even when our fingers brushed, just slightly, she would flinch with shock raising through her fingertips and fear showing in her bright green eyes.

We continued through the house just as we were and I timidly helped her sit on my bed before grabbing her something to wear for the night. I walked around my king sized bed which was covered in a warm comforter, since I have a tendency to get extremely cold during the nights.

I went straight to my oak stained dresser and grabbed an entire outfit for Karla, and surprisingly, she never said a word. Her silence seemed out of place since I knew what kinds of things went through my head when I get claustrophobic. I thought of everything between what I ate that day and the last time I saw a bullfrog at a pond. I had a tendency to speak random thoughts out loud during that time, not being completely conscious of it, similar to when a person talks in their sleep.

Her silence almost frightened me because I did not know what was going through her head, something I have always wanted to be informed about. She was difficult to read and her mystery had been partly what had drawn me to her, apart from her beauty and confidence. But she never had a problem with speaking. She could always keep any conversation going. Plus, I never got tired of Karla. I could see her everyday, nonstop for the rest of my life and only fall in love with her more with every second.

I pulled out the outfit and set it on the bathroom counter gently averting my eyes from the mirror in front of me. Every time I look in the mirror, I cry. It's hard for me, no matter how hard I try to have confidence but it never works. I cannot pretend to have confidence when I don't. Anyone should know that. I'm disgusting and unworthy of anyone or anything. I had the most beautiful girl in the world sitting on my bed right now, but here I was, hideous and disgusting.

Just when I told myself I wouldn't, I looked up and met my reflection in the eyes. Stubborn tears immediately formed in the outskirts of my eyes and I tried my best to blink them away,but every single one of them were freed down my pale cheek.

Before I could think straight, I looked in the mirror to notice Karla leaning against the white wooden doorframe with her eyebrows raised with concern and sadness. I met her eyes steadily but carefully trailed them away to the wall right behind me, noticing the details of my small bathroom.

The walls are a baby blue color, with a cream colored ceiling above me. I made sure that my ceiling was higher than most other bathrooms because of my claustrophobia. I prefer to not have panic attacks when I am using the restroom. I have a very large mirror, stretching almost completely across one wall because it made the bathroom seem larger than it really was. I kept everything fairly tidy in here, surprisingly. My friends normally know me as being disorganized and sloppy. Second to Liam.