rory

seventeen

Aurora's POV

That really happened didn't it?

I nearly kissed my best friend, and I was the one who pulled away after initiating it.

Picking at the skin on my lip, I trudge my way back, turning around occasionally in hope she'll follow.

She doesn't.

I stumble my way back into the gym, clearly agitated at my own stupidity. Yaz must notice this as she tells the boys 'she'll be back' and quietly jogs over to me.

She escorts me back out into the corridor and tells me to sit. I pull a face in disgust to which she rolls her eyes and presses on my shoulders for me to take a seat.

"What happened Aurora? I can see right through your lies, just a reminder. Erica left to find you and I know something happened between now and then."

"Long story short, I got all emotional like I normally do and so she just wanted to comfort me," I inform her, avoiding eye contact.

"Then what? That's not even a story."

I shrug and say,"Right sorry, we nearly kissed I guess."

"What the fuck do you mean 'nearly'? I've been a shipper of you two since like..forever! Just make out already, it's simple really."

"It's not simple because I don't know what I am, I don't know what I feel and I really wanted to kiss her, I did, but I couldn't. I panicked okay?"

"Shit, sorry that's not what I meant. So..do you like her then?" she tilts her head and bites down on her lip.

I nod and put my head in my hands.

"You two are good together. You just seem to fit. I think she's helped you become more comfortable with yourself."

"She has. But now, I don't know what to do because I've probably fucked everything up as per usual."

"I'm sure that if you talked to her, told her how you feel and that you're still figuring yourself out, she would understand."

"Yaz, you know how awkward I am, how can you even suggest that?"

"Look Aurora, you're going to have to put yourself out into the world eventually, you know Erica better than anyone. Would she ever say or do anything to upset you?"

"No, she wouldn't."

"So what are you waiting for? Get a wriggle on and find the woman!"

She offers me hand and pulls me up onto my feet, shoving me gently down the corridor.

"Now I've got to drag the lads back to their dorm, be grateful it's not you doing it Aurora!"

I laugh at that and thank her for everything to which she smiles and gestures for me to start moving.

-

The only place Erica can be is our dorm room, considering how she didn't show up to the gym and she wasn't in the dining room as I walked by.

So as of right now, I'm hesitating whether to enter the room or not.

"Would she ever say or do anything to upset you?"
What Yaz said earlier continues to run through my mind.

I'm going to barge in there.

Not quite, but close enough.

I twist the handle and peak my head through, she's sat facing the door but behind her painted canvas so no one can see what she's working on.

"Uh..hey," I wave my hand slightly and give her a gentle smile. We make eye contact but she looks away instantly.

I really did fuck up.

"Oh hi, you're missing out on the movie aren't you?"

"It's no big deal, we all decided to head back anyways. Besides, I have things to do."

"Like what?"

"Talk to you."

I take a seat down on my bed facing her side profile.

She's so pretty.

"You never want to talk to me."

"Who said that? I always want to talk to you, believe it or not."

"Try making that more clear next time."

Ouch. I don't think I've ever realised how much hurt I've caused her.

"Right, sorry. I want to talk to you about earlier."

"Go on," she continues with even brush strokes on her painting.

"I like you. If that wasn't obvious from our encounter in the dining room, well now it is. See, I don't know what I am, all I know is that I'm madly infatuated with you and I don't want to drag you into this mess of a sexuality crisis, when you already have yourself figured out."

I catch my breath for a quick second and then continue.

"You're so funny, you are the kindest person I know, you make me smile even when I'm on the verge of tears, you're insanely good at art.
I couldn't ask for anyone better to be in my life.
You make me the best version of myself."

Erica's looking directly at me now, her mouth open ever so slightly and she has a glimmer of joy in her eyes.

"Do you mean that?"

"Of course I mean that. You give my life meaning and you give it hope, why wouldn't I be completely obsessed with you."

"I tend to be too clingy, to the point where it's annoying though."

"That's okay. It's why I like you. You just never give up, whilst that may be a bad thing at times, it's always for the good when it comes to you."

Erica mutters under her breath, "for fuck sake, you're so irresistible."

She stands up from her seat and takes a few steps towards me. Her arms snake their way swiftly around my waist. She hesitates, clearly asking for permission to kiss me.

I'm grinning now and I nod to let her know that she can.

We both smile into the kiss, my hands tangled in her golden hair, her hands are placed so carefully on my back.

It was a soft and delicate kiss. Such a bittersweet moment to share with the person who makes me feel loved and understood.

Her touch gives me shivers as she moves her thumb up and down.

I don't know what's going to happen after this but frankly I don't mind.

I'm happy and that's what matters the most.
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Note for today:
22.10.22
It's been a while my friends.

I think this chapter is my favourite ngl🙇‍♀️
I want a love like theirs, it's my story and it makes me feel so lonely.