Radio Active

Section 12

"Hey!" I look behind me to see Eric jogging towards me, I've just left the cafeteria so he must have followed me from there. I stop and wait for him to catch up.

"Hiya." I say greeting him once he reaches me.

"Good day at work?" He asks as we start to walk to no where in particular.

"Yeah a bit stressful......" I stop in my sentence when I remember about Jeanine coming and Eric not telling me. "Did you know? About Jeanine." I raise my eyebrow and look at him, he shrugs.

"Yeah." He admits. I notice that his arms are exposed and nip him, digging my nails into his flesh. Eric yelps and slaps my hand away.

"I hope it bleeds." I hiss laughing a little at his face.

"Thanks a lot, who knew you are so sadistic."

"Your welcome! And I have my moments." I happily say and we begin to walk again.

It seems that we're headed for the chasm but we've still got a few corridors to get there. "Do you..." Eric scratches the back of his head, "Do you want to come to mine?" I smile at the floor.

"Yeah, okay."

"Great." We walk a little more through the dark, stone, dimly lit corridors until we turn for the Chasm bridge.

We turn and I stop in my tracks and stare at the sight in front of me, it's not an awful sight but I can see it leading to one.
Penny sits, her legs hanging over the edge, a bottle in her hands held tight, and two empty bottles next to her thigh. It dawns on me why she's like this, I can't believe it hasn't entered my mind until now. It's my dad's death anniversary.

Eric walks cautiously over to my drunk sister but, not to close. I walk over too, holding onto the rail, Eric looks at me confused but I shake my head. "Did, you, forget?" Her voice is shaky and I gulp at her question because the truth is, I did. "DID YOU FORGET!" She shouts and I don't quiet expect it so I jump at her words like a frightened lamb.

"No." I say quietly and my sister jumps from her place and turns to look at me. Her eyes are puffy and full of hurt and anger, I try to look at her but I can't, not at those eyes, those eyes that blame me for the collapse of our family.

"Don't lie to me!" She says not as loud but her voice is still shaky coated in anger.

"Yes Penny, I did." I say truthfully and she shakes her head, I look at Eric who looks extremely confused but I'll explain to him one day about all this.

"You never care, do you? That's why you we're always fine! You never cried! You never lost sleep! You never showed anything because YOU DIDNT CARE!!" Anger builds up inside of me that I can't control, I step closer and point at my sister. I feel Eric coming near me but I don't want him anywhere near me right now.

"Penny you know nothing! How dare you say those things! Your not me! You will never understand what it was like to be me after dads death! And especially mam's! Who was it who had to see dads crumpled, bloody body because no one else could go and identify it!? I DID!
Yeah I didn't lose a lot of sleep! Wanna know why!? Because I would wish myself to sleep and hope and pray that I wouldn't wake up in the morning, but it never happened! You always wondered where I would go off too and leave you and mam in the house, I went into the far fields away from everyone and I would scream and cry and rip myself apart because I couldn't show any weakness around you guys because I had to keep you and mam together! I was the one who kept us together! Or I at least tried. I pretended to be brave and strong just for you guys but really I was torn apart and broken inside and do you know what!? I still am!" I take a deep breath and move closer to Penny, her face isn't as angered as it was its consumed by something else.

"You want me to die, I know you do. I know you blame me but I did nothing wrong! I tried to do right but you hate me! You told me that you wished I had drowned and died while trying to save mam and do you know what? I do too! and to this day I still wish I had drowned as life would be a hell of a lot easier." I stop and look around me and realise what I've just said that I've just let out everything in a fit of rage, I look at Eric and his face is unreadable but he just stares at me. I touch my face to feel a dampness, I'm crying. "I...... I'm sorry." I choke and I run, I don't know where to but I run.

I don't know where I'm running but, I don't stop. I collapse on the floor, my knees hitting hard on the cold ruff stone. I curl up and loudly sob into my knees, this is why I don't tell anyone what I went through, this is what happens when I think about it, I break down.

I feel something wrap around me, something warm. I'm brung up and held, my face in a hard chest and an arm around my shoulder and an arm under my knees, I'm not sure who is it but I begin to sob into their chest anyway.

I try to control it but I can't and my breath begins to hitch. I feel something rub gently up and down on my shoulder, comforting me but I still cry. "Don't hold it back, its me." I recognise the deep, manly voice to be Eric, I bury my face into his chest harder.

******

Eric opens his door, I don't know how as he's been holding me the whole time. My head is still buried into his chest and I'm still sobbing. I feel Eric move down and he must have sat on his sofa, I move my head and look around.

My vision is blurry with tears and I cry even more, a headache forming in my head. Eric puts his hand on my face, wiping my tears away with his thumb, he looks at me and a swell of emotion hits me again and I start to cry harder.

Eric wraps his arm around me and brings me closer into him so my face is in his neck, I feel something soft touch my forehead and it takes me awhile to realise that Eric has just kissed me. I smile a little but then a cry takes over.

I move my head into Eric's chest and try to suppress my crying but it's not working, making Eric bring me even closer into him. His embrace is warm and caring, he draws patterns with his fingers on my clothed body and it soothes me. He is a very warm person, his body heat seeps into my cold hollow one, warming me up making me feel whole inside. I know it sounds weird but right now even though I've just had a break down this is the safest I've ever felt, being in Eric's arms feels so right.

I wish myself to sleep trying to get the memories out of my head but everything is coming back but I try my best to drift off in Eric's embrace.

A/N
Some of the past has been revealed!!! Thanks for reading, it mean a lot.
Comment, Share, Vote and ENJOY!!! ;)
~ImagineThatFanGirl