Scandal (Book One)

Chapter 6

My heart seemed to plummet, aching. I felt as if I'd just been punched in the gut.

This could not be happening.

Oh, but it was. If only, if only it just suddenly disappear, vanish, like it was just some horrid nightmare.

My mouth was still agape, for I'd just been about to shout Lucy's name. My fists were tight, knuckles white.

I just sat there, limp, as if in a daze. Lucy seemed so far away now. She seemed almost gone, as if in another world. Yet what pained me the most is she kissed him back.

"Screw this," I choked, voice cracking. I then turned away, disappearing into the forest, cursing myself, my life.

I hate it all.

~

(Lucy's P.O.V.)

My head snapped towards the forest, heart beat accelerating. "Was someone there?"

Gray shook his head, staring at me, his gaze full of longing. "Lucy--"

"Gray." I scolded, pushing him away. "I can't do this." His face flashed with a look of hurt, and immediately felt as if I were drowning in my own guilt.

Yet the gaping hole it my chest, the emptiness, it still gnawed. It still hurt. I remembered how Gajeel and Levy looked at one another, each deeply in love, craving for their companion's touch. Despite our kiss, I could never imagine Gray and I being like that.

He reached for me once again, almost like an apology, and although one side of me craved for his comfort, I resisted, leaning away. "You still love him, don't you?" His voice was a whisper; eyes still full of hurt.

My throat began to clench. "No, Gray, we're not like that, I swear it! It's just...I'm not her. Stop fooling yourself." I knew my words were harsh, yet I saw small recognition beginning to form. "You're right." He said at last, turning away from me, only to face the water.

He reached out, almost as if he were trying to touch somebody who was no longer there. "She loved this place, you know that?"

"Yeah." I said, head low. "I know."

He stood up and helped me to my feet. "It's late. Let's get home."

~

It was only my junior year of high school. It only took that long to have my heart broken, twice, may I add, leaving me crumpled up in my bed.

"Damn that Loke," I croaked between tears. "Damn him."

My phone chimed off the table with urgent text messages from friends. "Where are you?" And, "why aren't you at school today?" Reaching over, I powered my phone off.

I wanted to be alone today. I wanted to grieve in peace.

Maybe later I'd admit the inevitable, admit how stupid I had been, admit how I had managed to have my heart stomped on and forgotten twice as if it were a piece of meaningless trash. To some it may be.

Desperately I wanted to escape to simpler times. When I could dance without a care, sing without worrying over who was watching. I clutched my pillow close to me, thankful for it's comfort. The simpler times, when I didn't wonder about how stupid I'd been over trusting the same boy twice, or fretting and crying over an aching heart.

It was plain stupid.

So why did I care?

The thought seem to manifest, that simple question being one I couldn't answer. Did I love him? Had I ever loved someone?

Love.

Suddenly I felt a sharp tapping on my back. I stifled a groan. Was it father? Had he gotten back from work early, to pick something up. "Go away," I muttered into the pillow. "I want to be alone."

"Well, too bad. I'm not leaving you alone, Luce."

I snapped up, suddenly aware of the figure who lurked behind me. "Natsu!" I scolded, drying up my tears. "You can't go breaking into people's houses like that! And..."

'And you can't see me like this,' I so desperately wanted to add, but I didn't have the nerve to, so instead I just buried my face in my pillow.

"Luce." His voice was sharp; tone serious. "Do you know how worried I've been? How worried we've been? Plus, it wasn't breaking in. I just happen to know where you keep your spare key."

"Mrs. Robin is gonna beat your ass." I muttered, addressing our English teacher. "She'll eat you alive once she finds out you skipped."

"I don't care." He said flatly, and I could feel my bed groan from his weight as he sat down beside me. "It won't be any worse then what I'm gonna do to Loke. Again."

"Natsu, please, just don't. I can handle things fine on my ow--"

"And yet you don't look so fine right now!" He spat, and I could see from peeking beneath my pillow that his fists was balled angrily. "I told you to stay away from him. Loke is nothing but trouble, he--"

"It's my life, Natsu!"

A pause. He shifted uncomfortably, and I raised my head finally, to look at him. I'm sure I must have looked ridiculous; mascara running down my face, smudged lipstick, face red from tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered, looking straight at me. "I just don't want you to get hurt."

I could feel a lump form, eyes water, the tears threatening to spill. "Natsu. You can't save me from everything."

"I can try. And you can be as sure as hell that I will."

Maybe it was how sincere he sounded, or how he didn't care that I probably looked like a zombie from The Walking Dead, but I burst into tears. They spilled down my face. He pulled me close to him, embracing me.

He had seen me at my worst, knew of all my flaws, knew what a mess I am.

"Luce, it'll be alright." He spoke softly, like he was speaking to a small, sobbing child, trying to offer them comfort. "Are you sure?"

"I promise."

~

I awoke with a beating heart, tears wetting my pillow. Natsu.

I cradled my head in my hands, allowing myself to sob silently, grieving over the perfect mess of it all.

Why did everything have to be so...complicated?

"Do you love Natsu?"

Sobbing harder.

"You still love him, don't you?"

"Why?" I croaked through the tears. "Why do I have to be in love with my sister's husband?"

A/N: sorry not much happened in this chapter, but how will Natsu act around Lucy now knowing that she kissed Gray? Just a thought. Anyways, like always, happy shipping!

-THIS WHOLE BOOK IS UNEDITED-