Today I sat at the door waiting for your arrival but you didn't come. My mom told me that it's getting old but she doesn't understand. She hasn't lost a best friend she still has her parents, she still has her best friend from the 6th grade, she still has me. My friend I keep telling myself that you're playing this cruel joke on me to be honest that would be better then you being gone.
Who, what, when, where and why. That's what she asked me when I sat in the red chair that was so long my feet couldn't hang off it. I didn't know how to answer the five w's I couldn't even answer myself half the time. I just stared and waited for her to say something else but she didn't she just waited.
I answered "My best friend" for the who. "I don't know" for the what. "September 13" for the when. "My house over the phone" for the where. Why? I don't know why, I don't know why I spend all my hours, seconds, and minutes on you. I don't know. I think part of it is because you're my best friend, I don't like saying were because it sounds like you're in the past and you're not. If I leave you in the past it means I would forget you and I don't want that.
My mother told me that you're happier now and you just needed to feel free. I know it's true but I don't want to accept it. I'm trying to enjoy these last few weeks until I leave, I don't know where I'm going but I hope it's not far.
The sun hasn't been out much this week it's starting to worry me only because I don't know what's going on. I mean it's may and the sun isn't out. I'm missing it. Staring at the moon feels like I'm staring at myself for countless hours at a time. I don't like that. I do say goodnight to it every night though just to let you know I haven't forgotten. Are you sad up there? Is that why the sun has been missing?
I could've helped you.
When somebody leaves you, you expect them to come back. Sometimes they don't sometimes they do. when you say goodbye to somebody they usually mean "I'm not going to see you again." a see you later means "I'll see you tomorrow if not I'll see you soon." If you're best friend is leaving you to go to a different school and you don't know how to handle it sucks. You could be in love with this person and you kept in the words to long and they found somebody else. My friend I have never been in such a confused state, I don't know what's going on with my feelings. I like him and I don't know how to say it. I need help.
My friend I miss you more then anything and I'm still waiting on God, he won't reply. I love and miss you, I'll see you soon. I promise.
