Rubato - Scarlett Johansson

Part 3

Scarlett's POV

I have no idea what to think right now, I mean I just learnt more about her in the span of thirty minutes than I have in three years. Yet I don't feel like I'm meeting a new person, just that I simply know her a little better. I like to believe that I know T, or well I know Theo. I know how she acts, I know her little mannerisms, I know things she would never say or tell people but I have picked up on it over the years. I like to think I know her. 

So when she starts pushing me towards her bed I figured we are done with her being soft and she is back to being T. Which honestly makes me frown a little. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy spending time with T, she is great. But Theo is out of this world, and I wish I could always be with her, even though I know that is probably impossible. I have seen peaks of Theo over the years, and tonight I have learnt more than I thought I ever would, and now that I know something I selfishly want to know it all. I selfishly want to know anything and everything there is to know about Theo Thomson, I want to be the person who can say they know her best in life. Which isn't fair, I mean what am I to her? A friend? A fuck buddy? I mean it's not like I'm her girlfriend of anything, a girl could wish though.

As she pushes me onto the bed I quirk a brow teasingly, I have to admit this is normally the other way around, but I'm not going to complain. While I may typically be in charge when she decides to top, she tops. Talk about the best sex I've ever had. She truly is magical, and a selfish part of me can't help but wonder how many people she has practised on. How many people does she continue to be with on the nights she isn't with me?

 Although that track of thought didn't last long, as soon as my back hit the mattress a weight was on top of me, yet it wasn't in the way I was expecting. Theo just dug her head into my chest, wrapping her arms around me as she held on tightly, which was a mix of adorable and concerning. She has been very strict about our, situation, always keeping things purely sexual in the bedroom and purely friends the rest of the time. We have never done anything like this, believe me, I have tried, she is the one who would always find a way to escape, to reject any affections I gave her way. I always assumed she just wasn't one for hugging, but something tells me I was wrong about that, that something else was getting in the way of her letting me hug her.

This was the first time she had properly hugged me, and as much as I wanted this moment to never end, it actually terrified me. What was going through her mind right now? What had her seeking comfort, at this level as well? What happened to make Theo start T? What happened that made her feel that she couldn't tell anyone who she was anymore? What happened to make her push herself so deep down inside herself it leaves me questioning if she even knew who she is anymore?

"Theo baby, are you ok?" I finally bring myself to ask, as I play with her hair softly. I had started calling her baby when we were alone nearly a year ago, at first she had protested the pet name, but there was no way I was going to call her T while we were intimate, it just felt wrong, and now it had just become a habit. My question must have broken her out of her thoughts as she looked up at me with teary eyes, a vulnerability I had never seen in her before dancing in them as she sniffled slightly. "Um, God, I'm sorry. You probably want to go home" she muttered, moving to roll off of me but I just tightened my hold on her. Three years of knowing her and this is the only hug I have gotten, no way am I letting go so soon. We have a lot of time to make up on.

She kept trying to get up, but once she realised I wasn't letting go she went limp, looking up at me with a questioning gaze "the kids are with my Mom for the night, I don't have anywhere to be" I reassure her, giving her my best smile in the hopes of conveying my sincerity. I really don't want to leave her, I need her to know that. "Are you sure? I'm really not in the mood tonight, I know we normally do, it's just..." she trails off, looking down guiltily which breaks my heart.