Rubato - Scarlett Johansson

Part 27

Scarlett's POV

Four weeks without Theo were not fun, so the idea that we still have eight weeks until the tour is over makes my heart physically hurt. As if missing her wasn't enough the kids haven't been dealing with it all too well either. Rose isn't too bad because she understands, she has grown up with me having to travel for filming and she even remembers that Theo goes on tour sometimes. I mean Theo had only been back like three months before this tour started up. Although just because she understands doesn't mean she is happy about it. I love her but the little shit takes up most of my facetime time with Theo, most of the time I have to force the phone out of her hands which she lets me do, only to have a meltdown nearly every day when Theo eventually hangs up.

It has gotten to the point that she is now pretty much constantly walking around the house with her headphones on listening to Theo's music, it's like my sweet little eight-year-old has turned into a moody teenager already, which Lizzie and Flo think is hilarious. I have no idea which songs she is listening to though because she refuses to share the playlist with me, which I think is harsh, but she says it's her and Mama's secret playlist so I'm not allowed to listen. I mean I feel like my girlfriend could have made me a mixtape and not just Rose one, but that is an issue I will have to bring up to Theo not complain to Rose about.

That being said I swear some nights I hear her playing it on a low volume in Cosmo's room when they are both supposed to be asleep. In fact, I have caught her a few times, asleep on the floor by Cosmo's crib as soft acoustic songs dang by Theo, that I have never heard before, play softly around the room. It's too cute to be mad at Rose for long, even if she is an annoying pain in my ass lately. The worse part is when she has to do her school work and her tutor takes her headphones off her. That normally results in a meltdown, or five. Her tutor is not impressed and wants to know why Rose keeps screaming for her Mama during her lessons, I tried to explain but I don't really know how to. It's not like I can just say oh my girlfriend is on tour and Rose is not happy about it. I mean Theo and I aren't exactly public and while some people might speculate, only a very small handful of people actually know.

Cosmo on the other hand isn't as understanding. He spends most of his day throwing a tantrum for his Mama. I blame the fact that Theo spoils him so much. I go to put him in the highchair, meltdown screaming for his Mama. I go to put him in the playpen, meltdown for his Mama. I go to sit him down so he can play, meltdown. I go to pick him up, meltdown. It's like I can't win and it is exhausting and just adding to my missing Theo all the more. Surprisingly the only person he isn't a total nightmare for at the moment is Flo. To say she is over the moon is an understatement. I think it is because when she talks she sounds like Theo and that calms him down. I think he just finds a familiarity in Flo that reminds him of his Mama. I know I do. 

Speaking of Flo, the bitch went to Vegas this morning to surprise Theo tonight after her concert. I wanted to do that but I lost at rock, paper, scissors. The fact that I had to play rock, paper, scissors to even propose the idea of seeing my girlfriend is ridiculous but I guess that is what things have come to. I mean I can't sulk too much, I will be seeing Theo tomorrow anyway. She is driving to LA first thing in the morning, spending the day with the kids and me before going on the Late Late Show with James Corden. Then the next day we are all going to hang out while she gets ready for her concert, only to do the same thing Sunday before she gets a late flight to Toronto. It sucks that it's such a short time together but I will take what I can get given that I am stuck here in LA for basically the remainder of her tour, so meeting her is pretty much out of the window.

When she text me she was going out I felt bad for her. I mean I know how exhausted she has been, and judging by her tired eyes when we facetime I don't think she has been sleeping all that well. This means her going out to a club is definitely not at the top of her to-do list, but she explained what Rory said and I can understand why she is doing it. She wants the transition from T² to Theo to be smooth and over time, she doesn't want it to seem like boom she is a new person. So making appearances like this, even if it is significantly less frequent, is important. Especially because she plans to take a break from everything after the baby. Although she keeps saying that before coming up with new work she can do. Honestly, if she wasn't so amazing I would be annoyed at how much she works, but I know how much she loves it and how much working helps her, so I understand. I just wish she could see that the world won't stop if she relaxes for a second.