Jason and Justin

The drive

Jason's POV

I should not have lost my temper with him I think as we drive down the interstate. Yes he was being disrespectful to our mom but I should not have hit him like that.

But I could not help myself. I hate it when he disrespects our parents and I lash out.

I look out at my brother who was sunk down in the seat with his head hung. We had been on the road for twenty minutes and he had not uttered a word.

"How is your head?" I ask breaking the silence.

"Its fine." Justin replied.

"I'm sorry that I hit you like that." I say as small daggers of guilt cut into my gut.

"Its okay." He then shifted in his seat.

"I think you should cut mom and dad some slack though." I tell him.

His face twisted in anger. "Cut them some slack."

"Yes cut them some slack." I said. "This was not easy for them."

"Could have fooled me."  He rested his head against the window. "They did not seem to have any problem with sending me away."

"Well they did Justin." I said. "At first they were against the idea. They did not want to send you away and thought that I was nuts for even suggesting it."

"What changed their minds?" He said with a quizzical look across his face.

"You're little stunt with Eddie and Ronnir"  Eddie and Ronnie were his best friends and his worst influences. Most of the trouble he got into in school was because of the two of them.  They were lowlife losers and for the life of me I did not see what my brother saw in them.

"Wait I thought you wanted to go to college with you because I got in trouble at school."

"No." I shook my head. "That is what convinced them that sending you away was a good idea." I looked at him. "But I had asked them about it a couple of months earlier."

"Why then?"

"Because I knew I would do a better job looking out for you." I replied. "Don't get me wrong I love mom and dad but they have not been the most responsible people when it comes to you."  They were such good parents to me but they seemed to lose all parenting skills when it came to Justin. They did not give him boundaries or any discipline. Just let him to do whatever he wanted.

That is why I had to step in. Why I had to become the parent that they refused to be.

"I guess." Justin shrugged.

"I know." I asked already aware of the answer. "I mean how many times were you late for school while I was gone."

"Six." He replied.

"Six." I said in disgust. "You were late for school six times in a two week period." I just shook my head.

"I didn't mean to be." He said softly.

"And you also failed your Geometry test because of their irresponsibility

My brother shifted in the seat and let out a small cough. "That was my fault really." His cheeks turned a slight red with embarrassment. "I got so caught up in Call of Duty I forgot all about the test."

"Yes it is your fault." I said. "But it is also their fault for not checking up on you and making sure you were studying for the test and not goofing off." 

How could they be so careless I thought as the frustration continued to grow inside of me. They should have known better. They should have known that he would not study without being prodded by someone.

"But I was the one punished." He then said with sadness in his voice.  I had taken his video games away for a month when I found out about the test.  I also had him write three hundred times I will not put work before video games.

And that was on top of the buttwhipping and month grounding he got for the incident with Tommy and Eddie.

"Well its not like I can punish them. " I  then thought about the pain on my mother's face as she said goodbye to my brother.  She was the suffering the consequences of her actions. She may not have recieved a butt whipping buy she is suffering just the same. They both are. So I guess in a way I did punish them.

"I hate being punished." Justin said in a pitiful tone.

"I know." I said. "And I hate punishing you."

"You do." He blinked in surprise.

"Of course I do." I said incredulous. How could he think I would. "I'm not a sadist. I don't enjoy disciplining you." It breaks my heart when I have to do it. "You understand that right?"

"Yeah." He replied but I could hear the uncertainty in his voice. The doubt in his eyes hit me like a physical blow. How could he think I would take a pleasure in whipping him or making him stand in the corner?

I pulled over to the side of the highway and I could a nervous ripple cross his face.

"What's going on?"

I put the car into park and said "I just want to assure that I only have your best interests at heart when I punish. I wish that I do not have to I really do." My voice then cracked with emotion. "But I do it because I love you."

"Jan and Pete..." I then gave him a scathing look and he quickly said "Mom and dad don't punish me does that mean they don't love me?"

"No?" I said firmly. "It just means they don't love you as they should." The thought of their neglect toward him brought a twinge pain to my stomach. I hated how they were more focus on their careers than on him. How they forced me to grow up faster than I should have. How I had to play parent to my little brother.

"If they truly loved you like they should they would have never allowed you to run wild like they did."

"Me run wild." Justin laughed as if he heard the most hilarious joke in the world. "Hardly."

"Yes you have." I told him.  "And you know that you have."  I shook my head in dismay as I thought how much they had spoiled him.  "They would have never let me get away with half of the stuff you have."  I then choked and said "Anyway you are going to stop calling our parents by their first names."

"Yes sir."

"They might not be the best parents in the world but they don't deserve to be disrespected like that."

Even though he did not say it I could hear the words yes they do go through his mind.

"This is your final warning." I told him. "The next time it happens I am taking my belt off and beating your backside."

"Yes sir."

"And stop calling me sir." I said with ire in my voice. "I'm your brother not your teacher."

"Yes, Jason." He said and then looked out the window again.

I sighed as I thought that this was going to be a long semester for the both of us.