Jason and Justin

Chapter 10 First Meetings

                              Justin's POV

Shame washed over me as I walked over to the wall and placed my hands on top of my head.  I kicked myself inwardly for my incredible stupidity.  The word dumb repeated over and over again in my head.

What was I thinking I chided.  Did I actually think he would go four months without asking about the paddle.  That my brother who notices everything would not notice it was missing.

That he would not ask about it.

That he would believe your lame lies.

I should have just packed the blasted thing. I should have did what he told me.

And even if I didn't I shouldn't have lied to him. I should have come clean the moment he asked me. Told the truth and pleased for his mercy.

But I was too idiotic to do any of that.

That would have required common sense. And if I was in possession of such a thing I would be back home with my parents, with my friends, my school.

I would not be facing the wall with my hands on top of my head waiting for judgment to come.

I could feel butterflies slowly begin to spead their wings in the deepest pit of my stomach as I thought about what that punishment was going to be. My brother was not going to be content with just making me stand in the corner like he did last night.

No my crime was far worse than calling our parents by theit first name this time.  I disobeyed my brother and then I tried to conceal my disobedience by lying to him.

And there was only one punishment worthy of such a transgression.

A butt beating. An intense one that will make my backside feel like it was on fire.  One in which I won't be able to sit comfortably for at least a couple of days if not for a month.

And he did not need the paddle for that. He preferred the paddle but the belt worked for him too.

I gulped as I thought about the belt striking my backside. The butterflies that had invaded my stomach were flapping their wings harder. It felt like a tornado had formed in the pit of my stomach.

I wanted to take my hand off my head to hold my aching stomach but I did not dare. I did not want to make this worse.

My eyes began to leak water as I waited.  I told myself to stop crying and to take my punishment like a man.

But I wasn't a man. I was a little boy. A terrified little boy who felt nothing but contempt for what he did.

Humiliation bubbled up inside of me. Embarrassement over my actions, over being made to stand against the wall, at river of water flowing off my cheeks. At the beating I was going to recieve

My humiliation could not possibly get any worse.

"I'm very, very disappointed in you." I heard my brother say.

I winced at the second very.

I cringed at the second very. A second very was not good.

"I'm sorry." I blurted out.

Not as sorry as you are going to be I heard a voice in my mind say. One that sounded very much like my brother's.

No I'm going to be extremely sorry in a few minutes if not seconds.

Then I could hear it. The unbuckling of his instrument of vengeance. It wasn't a loud sound but I could hear it. That small sound sent chills up my spine.