Luz and Reader

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I walked into the empty room, my despise for this small space apparent.  It held too much and yet was missing its soul piece.  Keeping my eyes trained on my task, I dropped off the box of books in the corner of Luz's room.  I was pretty sure they were her favorite book series and so I bought them all hoping it could somehow guide her home again. 

The box hit the ground with a heart breaking thud.  If Luz were here her squealing of excitement would fill the silence that echoed afterwards.  A familiar pain throbbed in my head at the thought of her.  Headaches had been plaguing me left and right in her absence, like I couldn't exist peacefully without her here. 

With a final glare at my naive offering, I spun to walk out the door.  I could practically hear Luz calling for me now through the pulsing of an oncoming headache.  It took me a split second of incredulous shock to realize that it was Luz calling my name. 

I anxiously whirled around, desperately looking for my crazy gremlin of a cousin.  The room remained empty but her muffled shouts still continued eerily.  My eyes finally landed on the mirror.  A yelp teared from me at the moving image of Luz in the reflection. 

"Gosh I've only been calling your name like, fifteen times," she huffed, though a smile was plastered on her face.  This had to be impossible.  There was no way I was seeing Luz in her bedroom mirror without her even being here.  A wave of vertigo hit me, making me sway on my feet. 

"Prima?" I shakily questioned, my mind having a hard time believing what I was seeing.  Perhaps the stress of the last few weeks was finally making me crack.  Even at that probability though, I wasn't passing up this chance to talk to Luz.  I rushed to the mirror, placing my hands against it like I could somehow feel her through the glass. 

"Where have you been?!  Where are you now?  How is this even possible?" I began to ask in a slight panic.  At this point I was ready to smash the mirror if it meant bringing my cousin back to me. 

"I've missed you so much and there's too many things I have to say to you and not enough time, primo.  I wanted to see that you're okay," she paused, taking a closer look at me with a frown.  "Are you okay?"  I shook my head sadly, not sure if I could handle this headache with my hallucination of Luz. 

"No, Luzzy, I'm not okay and this dream isn't helping," I groaned, my hands coming up to rub my eyes.  "This isn't fair, I've been nothing but good, I don't deserve this."  Tears brimmed in my eyes but I refused to let them fall, determined to not break down. 

"I'm so sorry primo, I'm trying to get back but I'm stuck in this...other world and I know you're not going to understand right now but you will eventually," she reassured with a sad smile.  Her hand reached up to rest underneath where mine was.  If I let my mind imagine it, I could almost feel the comforting heat of her fingers.  None of this made sense, my need to sleep apparently stronger than I had originally thought. 

"How did this even happen?  You were just supposed to go to camp," my voice wavered.  I looked to her desperately, my eyes trying to pry an answer from her.  She didn't even appear frightened at anything she said.  Only a look of relief and a tinge of guilt was found in her expression.  What did you do Luz?

"I'm so sorry but if I didn't run away I would have nev—". 

"You ran away?" I choked out, interrupting her next point.  Betrayal burned through me, my stress quickly shifting to frustration.  All this time and all this pain, just for her to have run away.  My hands retracted from the mirror, clenching at my sides. 

"Technically yes but—". 

"Your mother has been worried sick about you!  I thought someone had kidnapped you but you had just ran away?"  My teeth grinded at the audacity, the selfishness of such a thing.  I knew that Luz might have some sort of grief she carried with her but this was ridiculous and reckless. 

"It wasn't like that, I swear!" she exclaimed desperately but I didn't want to hear her excuses. 

"No, you don't get it Luz.  Tia Camila has been working double shifts and overtime for so long now to sustain us.  She's been trying her hardest for years now and this was too much for her heart.  You haven't seen her cry herself to sleep, grieving the child I can't be for her.  I've been trying to fill up the space you left behind, to take on all the chores, study extra hard so she doesn't have to worry, and get a job to get out of the house because everything reminds me of you.  I mean, prima, we love you and have been working hard to help you and you just leave?" I ranted with a shaky huff. 

Tears rolled down my cheeks, my chest heaving.  My headache throbbed, making me cry out in pain as my eyes squeezed shut.  When I could see again, I could tell I had spilled too much by the heartbroken look on Luz's face.  Her own tears streamed down her face, my regret settling in instantly. 

"God, Luz I'm sorry I'm just tired and I miss you so much.  I've been terrified of hearing news that the police found you but dread when they don't show up with anything," I sobbed quietly, dropping to my knees in front of the mirror.  My forehead rested against the cool glass to ease the heat in my face.  I glanced up at the figure of Luz crouching down to my level.  Our eyes locked in a sad staring match. 

"I'll be home soon, okay?  Just wait for me primo and get some rest.  I promise to explain everything," she cried quietly.  I nodded, not trusting my voice not to crack.  We sat like that for a few seconds before her reflection glitched. 

"I love you prima," I whispered, my hands reaching out to hers. 

"I love you too primo, I swear I do," she promised back.  I didn't even try to stop the remaining tears that flowed as I watched Luz's form flicker before completely disappearing.  The cold glass chilled my fingers and my heart. 

"Please come home Luz."

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