19 | CAN'T UNDERSTAND

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"I won't run away this time"

Minho's thumb glides along my bottom lip before leaning in and connecting our lips into a real kiss.

Last night was hardly as kiss it lasted no longer than two seconds and I ran away quickly as I was afraid of seeing his reaction.

Today, was a kiss. A kiss he reacted to. His lips moved with mine, while holds my cheek softly. I felt as he sighs into my lips, almost like he was finally getting what he wanted.

He pulls away, grabbing my waist and pulling me to straddle his lap. His lips find mine again as my finger goes to his neck and to the back of his hair.

His eager lips moving down to my neck, kissing below my ear he whispers "I always wanted to know
how sweet you tasted"

He continued to kiss my neck and I felt as he started to suck softly, making me pull him away from my neck and chuckle.

"Too fast?" He asks and I nod

"A little" I was about to climb off of his lap but he holds me in place, making chills run down my spine. "I-I turn in my project today" I try to make conversation.

"Yeah? How do you feel about it?"

I look down and fiddle with my hands, shrugging "I know I worked hard and lost lots of sleep to finish so, I guess I feel good" I look up and Minho just watches me.

"You'll get a good grade, I know it looks amazing" I smile softly at him.

༶•┈┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈┈•༶

"Jisung" I look beside me as I walk out of my last class, seeing Felix walking up to me.

"Yes?"

"I was wondering if you wanted to hang out today, like right now," Felix asks as he walks through the crowded halls as everyone just wanted to leave home.

"Right now? Why so sudden?" We walk out of the school.

"Well, Seungmin, Jeongin, and Hyunjin always hang out on Fridays, and today we decided on a movie night—they really want to hang out with you"

We stop at the gate and Felix turns to me with hopeful eyes.

"Looks like Jisung got himself a friend" We both turn to see the group that held satans children.

I see Minho with them as they sit at the table. Danielle clings to Minho as she starts fixing his hair, making him push her hand away.

I sigh and look at Felix "I can't, sorry" I said, feeling eyes on me and I knew they were Minho's but he couldn't hear what we were talking about as they were a good distance away.

Felix frowns "Why not?"

"I'm not good around others Felix, you know this"

Felix nods understandingly "I hope one day you will agree, they are good people Jisung. They won't hurt you"

I smile softly at him and put my hand on his shoulder "I know, just give me time. I'll think about it, yeah?" Felix nods.

༶•┈┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈┈•༶

I walk into the house, take off my shoes, and put my bag down.

"Jisung, son" I look to see my mom walk out of the kitchen, drying her hands. "How was your day?"

"Good," I said, avoiding her eyes.

"I called your school and they confirmed your project" I nod slowly "I'm sorry for yelling at you"

I sigh and look down "I'm sorry for running away" I mumble.

"I just want to protect you Jisung, I want you to understand my point of view" My mom spoke to me softly.

I look up at her "You think dad will hate me?"

My mom looked taken aback by my question, walking closer to me "I don't think your father will ever hate you, I just think he will be very disappointed"

"But aren't I already a disappointment? I mean I turned down the company—"

"Stop," My mom says, "You are not a disappointment, your father is proud of you. He has trouble showing it because he feels you need a bit of tough love is all"

"He expects me to be just like him. Mom, I don't want what he wants. I want to be my own person, and I want to love who I want"

My mom sighs "Get cleaned up Jisung, dinner will be ready soon" and with that, she walks away.

She walks away because she will never understand, yet she expects me to. I can't understand her point of view of things because she doesn't try to understand mine.

I didn't love Minho, but did I like him? Yeah. I did and I was scared. Not scared of the feeling itself but of how my family will react.



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