𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 - 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆

26 | MEANINGLESS CONVERSATION

I sit down at the familiar—unfamiliar table.

"I can get used to this," Felix says, smiling at me.

I look to the others who walk up to the table "The Han Jisung, gracing us with his presence for the second time?" Hyunjin says dramatically.

"I think we won him over boys," Seungmin says with a smile as they all sat down.

"Guys, let's not scare him off," Jeongin says, making everyone laugh but I just chuckled.

"So, did you get your grade for the project?" Hyunjin asks and it made my stomach drop. Thinking back to the park incident.

I nod slowly "Yeah, an A"

"Oh my god, me too!" Hyunjin says excitedly.

"Okay, onto something we all can talk about, the party this Friday?"

I drown them out as my gaze goes to the table in the far distance, Minho sat there with the group—like usual his attention was on his phone. My mind couldn't help but think about what we would be doing if things didn't go the way they did yesterday.

Would we be laughing, having a deep conversation, or maybe even kissing?

"How about you Jisung?" I look to Jeongin "Are you in?"

I swallow harshly, the party. I shook my head "I-I don't go to parties"

"This is the time to change that," Jeongin says and grabs my hands from the table and holds it in his, begging with his eyes.

"If he says no to Jeongin, he's a tough soldier," Hyunjin says.

I look around to everyone agreeing, looking at Jeongin "Can I think about it?"

Jeongin drops my hands and nod "Of course. One thing about me is I'm not Felix, I won't threaten you"

"No he won't, but he would show up at your house the night of the party and drag you out," Seungmin says "That's why we just agree"

I nod "I understand why y'all are friends now"

༶•┈┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈┈•༶

I rub my eyes tiredly, hearing my phone vibrate on my nightstand. I look at it to see it lighting up with a name.

I sigh, waiting for it to stop but it didn't. I stopped and then went off again, stopped and went off again and that's when I finally got up. Grabbing my phone and pressing answer without looking at the name.

"Jisung?" They spoke up before I could. A chill runs down my spine as my body stiffens.

"Minho?" I spoke without thinking, I knew it was him but I still needed confirmation.

"Can you come outside? I'm outside"

I furrow my brows and shake my head "It's late Minho—"

"Please" His voice was low and I sigh.

"Fine," I said "I'll be down in a few" I hung up. I sat there for a few seconds, thinking if I should really do this.

It had barely been a day since the park and I wasn't sure if I was ready to talk to him.

I get out of bed and without caring, I open the door of my room and quietly walk down the stairs, slipping on my shoes and putting on a jacket.

Walking outside hoping the cold air wakes me up, I rub my eyes tiredly and see the familiar black car. I run my fingers through my hair and walk to the car, getting in and trying to escape the cold air.

I hug my body, not looking at the male as I try my best to wake up.

"I woke you up?"

I look at him blankly "Yeah, I do remember it being in the middle of the night"

Minho chuckled lowly, I notice how tired he looked not because he just woke up like me but because he never got the chance to sleep.

"I just thought you would be drawing or something"

I shook my head and look ahead out the window "No, I'm in a block again"

More like, I have no inspiration.

"Oh"

I look at him "Is this why you woke me? To have a meaningless conversation?"

His eyebrows raised, shocked at how I talked to him. The tension in the air was thick. He shook his head "I wanted to apologize if you'd let me?"

I bite at the skin on my bottom lip and swallow harshly before nodding slowly "Fine, apologize"

I turn to face him and this seems to make him anxious as my full attention was on him.

"I'm sorry" He starts, looking down and messing with a bracelet that was on my wrist "I judged you, and truthfully I was shocked when I realized you weren't what they say", He hesitantly looks up at me again "But I could have stopped going that day we met. Once I realized."

"And why didn't you? Why did you keep going and why didn't you keep trying to get closer to me?" I felt myself grow emotional again.

"Because I couldn't, I wanted to get to know you better, genuinely. At first, it was as simple as feeling understood, but then I noticed how much I enjoyed being around you"

I look down and felt my chin wobble as I felt all my tears rushing to my eyes. Closing my eyes I heard him continue to speak "You probably hate me, and I can live with that but I can't live with you thinking I used or played you"

Slowly I felt a tear escape my eyes I forced it closed, not sliding down my cheek as I looked down but dropped straight onto my lap.

"Jisung, look at me" I felt him gently grab my chin, my eyes still closed "Look at me" He whispers.

As my eyes open, that's when the tears fell. Sliding down my cheeks and to my chin. "I don't hate you," I said "I want to hate you"

Minho nods and smiles sadly "I don't want you to"

I lean forward and embrace the male into a hug and he doesn't hesitate to hug back. my tears continued to fall and my chest shakes as I silently cried. Feeling him rub my back softly.

I didn't pull away because I couldn't face him. But I needed him so I continued to hug him tightly as I let it all out.

"You understood me, the first person that did" I start, and his hand stops for a moment for continuing to rub my back comfortingly. "I opened up to you... I even fucking kissed you" I pulled away, but still, my arms were wrapped around his neck as I spoke softly "I never kissed anyone before, I never even had a friend"

Minho frowns as he was realizing all these things again "How does it feel?" I spoke, "To be the person to make me feel this way?"

"Let me make it up to you—"

Finally, I pulled away and shook my head "I can't" I put my hand on the door, about to open it before I look at him "I appreciate your apology Minho but I don't want to feel like this again, I-I'm not use these feeling and honestly right now they feel like shit" I swallow harshly as he stared at me, almost begging me not to go or say what I'm about to say. I didn't want to give in, but I couldn't help but say "I just need time"

"But—"

"Minho, please... give me this at least" Minho closes his mouth and nods "Goodnight Minho"