Ahsoka Tano One-Shots

The Perfect Padawan

Heyo, human beings from outer space!

YOU GUYS TALES OF THE JEDI CAME OUT TODAY AND OH MY GOSH AAAAAAAAH!!!! ALL SIX EXPISODES IN ONE DAYYYYY!!!

But I actually can't watch it until later tomorrow so I'm just itching with eagerness to watch it and it's KILLING ME. But anyways, NO SPOILERS PLEASE 'cause I wanna see it for myself. 

So, with all that being said, how about some depressing garbage? 

Read on if you dare. 

Ahsoka Tano was the perfect padawan.

She did everything in her power to be the definition of just that: perfect.

Her master, Anakin Skywalker didn't want her. He thought she was bratty and slowed him down. So Ahsoka sped up. She trained endless hours to meet his expectations, held superior grades with her studies, and spoke boldly without hesitation to impress him.

But still, she knew the only reason he didn't ask for a new padawan was that he could tolerate her well enough.

Ahsoka did her best to keep the status of tolerable.

When Anakin and Ahsoka met for training sessions, he'd often give her hasty instructions before rushing off again. So Ahsoka exceeded all his expectations. He wanted her to record herself during training and find ten ways to improve? Fine, she'd find at least fifteen. He wanted her to complete fifty reps of an exercise? Fine, she'd complete a hundred. He wanted her to meditate for an hour? Fine, she'd meditate for two hours.

But still, she knew that the only reason Anakin didn't ask for a new padawan was that he could tolerate her well enough.

Ahsoka needed to do more. She needed to be better.

So she took up more responsibilities within her military rank. She worked the soldiers in training, took on more inventory and weaponry checks, worked twice as hard as anyone else during post-battle procedures, and jumped at the opportunity to fulfill any other obligations and tasks that no one else wanted to do.

But still, she knew the only reason Anakin didn't ask for a new padawan was that he could tolerate her well enough.

That, by no means, meant he liked her. He could only stand her, that was it.

It was clear to Ahsoka that he wanted her out of his sight as much as possible. Honestly, how could it not be clear? Between him constantly skipping training or arriving tardily, continuously disappearing from their quarters, and the obvious itching to get away from her, Ahsoka saw it clear as day.

He only kept her around because she didn't annoy him out of his wits. But the moment she slipped up, she'd be gone.

So she had to work harder, smarter, and become even more perfect.

Ahsoka never seemed to stop moving. She trained with every free moment of the day, skipped a meal here and there to fulfill military obligations, filled out the reports she was never required to, and to top it all off, stayed up late completing her studies.

But still, she knew the only reason Anakin didn't ask for a new padawan was that he could tolerate her well enough.

She tried doing more: whatever she could. She followed his lead and took mental notes on his behavior. Ahsoka observed that weakness was unacceptable in every way and that it must be avoided. Wonderful.

Ahsoka Tano became the opposite of weak. She operated brightly on minimal sleep and rations. During battle, she was willing to put herself in dangerous predicaments to save as many men as she could and to win. The most important thing was winning with the bare minimum of casualties.

The clones called her reckless. She called herself a try-hard.

It wouldn't matter if she was injured, anyway. She couldn't be weak, and exhibiting injury was a sign of weakness. She could do with a little pain. A little pain never killed anyone.

But still, she knew the only reason Anakin didn't ask for a new padawan was that he could tolerate her well enough.

Ahsoka pressed on through every day, pushing herself to her physical, mental, and emotional limits with as little food and sleep as possible. Such things as nutrition and rest seemed trivial next to her end goal: For Anakin Skywalker, her master, not to hate her.

The other padawans never worked so hard, but what did that matter? Her master was the chosen one, so naturally, her responsibilities and expectations quadrupled.

At first, her hard work paid off. Her physical capabilities increased tenfold and she was praised for her skill. She felt like she was getting somewhere, just for a little bit.

Ahsoka Tano felt like her perfection was paying off when Anakin Skywalker, her master, looked down at her with the tiniest hint of a smile playing at his features as he examined her academic reports.

Then, just when Ahsoka felt invincible, everything seemed to go up in flames.

Her work took a toll on her. Ahsoka's muscles ached and her mind slowly began filling with a fog that never wanted to lift. She trembled feverishly and her reaction time during battles dropped to dangerously delayed.

Ahsoka's grades dropped considerably. And that tiny hint of a smile Anakin offered, was gone. Completely, utterly, and miserably gone.

And once again, Ahsoka felt as though she'd be discarded.

It was one day, after a battle, that Ahsoka sighed a breath of near defeat. She couldn't stop her trembling and she felt like collapsing. Perhaps she'd hidden one too many injuries from Kix.

Nevermind that. Ahsoka began trudging to the mess hall. She couldn't remember the last time she'd eaten. She was tired and that never-lifting fog plagued her mind.

As she progressed, her pace slowed. Ahsoka felt as though there were burdens at her ankles dragging her down and bands restricting her lungs from drawing in breaths of air. At some point, she halted, leaning heavily against the wall and wheezing for air.

Ahsoka couldn't let anyone see her in such a condition.

Veering sharply left, Ahsoka staggered to her quarters and practically tumbled inside, her knees hitting the floor with an angry thump. The tears prickling her eyes overflowed from her eyelids and dripped down her chin. Her fingers clawed feverishly at the floor.

She wasn't enough. She never had been; she never would be.

She'd never be enough.

And everything hurt.

Slowly, Ahsoka Tano sank deeper into the floor, surrendering to the fate she'd always known would come but she'd never wanted. Failure.

Her shaking sobs tore into a scream of pure agony from utter exhaustion and pain. It was too much.

Because though Ahsoka Tano was the perfect padawan, she could never ever be perfect enough to live up to the standers of her master, Anakin Skywalker, the Chosen One.

In his eyes, she'd always be a failure.

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Word Count: 1,216

Published: October 26, 2022

I'm so tired right now I just my brain is not working and I'm pretty sure half of this is dramatically incorrect and my kitten is going wild and biting and scratching me to pieces. I'm so tired. Wait, I already said that. 

ANYWAYYYYY

I hope y'alls are havin' a great night full of Tales Of The Jedi. 

Requests are open, feel free to message me or make a comment if you have any ideas. 

Bye, peoples!