Delinquent High

Chapter 69

Wei Wuxian had only managed to go to sleep after a long while last evening, or perhaps it had already been closer to the morning more than anything, he had no idea since he had not been looking at a clock. Under these circumstances, it was then no surprise that he woke up exhausted and aching all over after another nightmare.

This time, he must have stayed sufficiently quiet so he did not alert Lan Wangji. He had difficulty breathing and discovered that he had a fist stuffed into his mouth. He must have been holding back his screams inside his nightmare and outside of it. He hid under the blanket and rolled into a tight ball. He had to keep himself together.

Wei Wuxian breathed through the pain in his heart. Despite his best efforts, he still remembered vividly standing stark naked in front of the class and having Jin Guangyao use him as illustrative example for their lesson. He had informed them that they would switch to human anatomy for that lecture. And since he had not had any posters or mannequins to show the students what exactly he had been talking about, he had used Wei Wuxian's naked body, pointing at all the parts he had been talking about. He had spent especially long time on the subject of male reproductive organs, their functions and their usual sizes, a department where Wei Wuxian according to Jin Guangyao's words was badly lacking.

Wei Wuxian had all but forgotten that anything like this had ever happened. It was no wonder really, back then, he had been in such a hazy state that he barely remembered anything at all. However, it seemed like in his sleep, his mind still let him experience all the humiliation tenfold. He must have been holding in a tortured scream.

When he calmed down sufficiently to be sure he would not cause another scene in the middle of the night, he slowly took his fist away from his mouth. He looked at it in bewilderment, it did not feel like it belonged to him. There were bite marks all over it, how come Wei Wuxian had barely noticed them until he had seen them? From the looks of it, they should have hurt a lot. But he did not feel anything. How curious.

He concentrated on ruminating about this fact for a long while. It was preferable to thinking about anything else. He did not want to remember his nightmare or which events had caused it.

After a while of juggling with his racing mind. Wei Wuxian realized that he was not going to go back to sleep. He was still tired, exhausted even, but the simple thought of facing any of his terrible dreams again scared him to the brink of another panic attack. It was better to remain awake.

He crawled out from under his blanket and blinked in the harsh light in the room. It was still completely black outside, but just as Wei Wuxian had wanted, his room was fully lit. He was not sure if he would ever be able to stand small or dark spaces. He associated too much unpleasantness with those now.

Memories threatened to come flooding his mind again and Wei Wuxian quickly picked up his phone from the nightstand where he had place it yesterday. Jiang Yanli had not forgotten to pack it for him even though it was probably done behind Madame Yu's back. All his belongings had been shipped here, with exception of all the expensive items like Wei Wuxian's collection of musical CDs and his flute. He knew he could not keep those, it had been the Jiang family which had paid for them, he did not have the right to take it now that they were throwing him away.

Jiang Yanli must have been trying to be political about it, but Wei Wuxian knew better. There was no way Madame Yu would ever want to see him in the home of her family. He had already lost them. He wondered how long it would take for Lan Wangji to also come to the conclusion that he was better off without Wei Wuxian around. Then, he would be all alone.

Wei Wuxian shook his head vehemently, as if he could physically get rid of any more uncomfortable and scary thoughts. The future terrified him to the marrow of his bones.

He switched on the phone. He purposefully ignored all missed calls and received messages. He also did not go to social media to distract himself. For all he knew, everything about him had already been leaked to the public by Wen Chao and his lackeys. There was no way he wanted to read those stories and the comments which they would inevitably cause.

No, it was imperative for the remainders of his sanity to stay away from everything as much as he could. No internet and no listening to or reading the news that his family and his former friends did not want him around anymore. Instead, he switched on a simple match three game and stared at the colourful tiles as if he had seen them for the first time in his life. There were cute little baby animals depicted on them. Oh, there were three bunnies he could match.

He went on to start the level when his finger froze in the middle of its way to the screen. Wei Wuxian noticed the date and time in the upper corner. His hands started shaking and the phone fell onto the bed.

It was 3 AM. Monday.

Wei Wuxian jumped out of the bed and frantically looked around the room. It was Monday. A school day. And during the weekend, he had not touched any of his homework. What was he to do now? There was no way he could finish everything in just a few hours. Not even mentioning that on Friday, he had not been in a correct state of mind to care about which assignments he was supposed to do. Now he had no idea and his mind went back to panicking.

He all but run towards the desk and desperately searched for the school bag he had hidden underneath last evening. He found it and immediately got it out from there. He took everything out and looked at the books and notebooks it contained. His eyes were blurry with panicked tears and he tried to blink them away and concentrate on the task at hand.

He had to do at least something. Handling in an unsatisfying work, was way better than not having done anything at all. The consequences were still painful and he would not like the mocking from the teachers, but it was still better than the other option. He did not want to get another detention where he would have to write apology lines while a classroom full of smirking teenagers would be looking at his bare behind.

Gasping for air and with his hands shaking so much it was hard to hold anything in them, Wei Wuxian sat down onto the chair – so soft, so unlike those at the Delinquent High – and pushed the books aside to make some space. Then, he grabbed the closest one and opened it where he supposed the materials and information from the lecture on Friday must have been. Luckily, most teachers were going through the books meticulously, so it would be a little easier to guess what could have been assigned as homework.

Wei Wuxian rubbed his eyes in a feeble attempt to get rid of his tears and fatigue. He was not getting far when he could not even read anything because the whole world was too blurry. He picked up a pen on his third attempt, it kept falling out of his hand because of how much it was trembling and hurting – it was the hand he had bitten in his sleep, it was now that the numbness chose to go away –, and he started writing frantically. He was barely conscious of what actually he was putting down on that piece of paper in front of him. He just had to write something, or the consequences would be grave.

Or, more precisely, worse than he was prepared to face. He only had a handful of hours, he had to make the most of them. It was hard to breathe when he was hyperventilating and imagining the already sure punishment, but Wei Wuxian pushed through with all the force of sheer survival and self-preservation instincts. He was now living on the school grounds, if he did not want to really end up under a bridge somewhere, he had to continue going to school, no matter how much he was terrified by the sheer prospects or hated it.