TBATE - To fulfill a promise

5. Alacryan Coalition

A/N: my google doc was suddenly glitchy so there might be some weirdness in this chapter. Please if you see it, comment it so I can edit it out.

Tessia Eralith's POV:

I thought I was dreaming. I have to be dreaming. How else would I explain the use of fire and lightning despite my full royal elven blood heritage? Nothing made sense, my connection to mana, the purple godly particles, and Cecilia's memories. It has to be a dream.

I raised my hand, rethinking my fight and the feeling I had, it felt right. But there wasn't any spark. Even at how much or how much I condensed, there was no fire or lightning generated. Out of my extended arm, there came bursts of pure mana that lingered uncontrollably in the air. A feeble attempt to reenact the fire and lightning affinities.

The stench of boiling blood woke me up from my concentration, looking at the dead chimeras filled with burn marks and the overly huge body that still spasmed at the small electric current it released. It was the only scenery that made me believe that it wasn't a dream.

My head turned, at the door opposite of me. It was open, and the light from the door made me glad that I didn't turn blind. The purple light from the countless sconces died out, deepening the feeling of this place being abandoned and that the very space around me told me to move as if it was alive.

The wall I leaned on was chiseled, allowing me to grab something while I stood. Taking multiple steps, my muscles finally lined up with my brain and my nerves worked properly again, making walking normal again.

My stomach rumbled in hunger, my head turned to the chimera body and the idea made me gag.

Remnants of Cecilia

I'm Cecilia. Or at least I'm supposed to be that person. My memory —the only source of my identity— says that. But my body rejected that statement. I felt like a nobody, just existing forever in this abyss.

The state I was in was comparable to soulless. I had emotions, but they were gone. Only remnants from my memory existed but they were slowly disappearing. Though, the state I was in isn't entirely emotionless. I don't like to call myself that way, since I knew that was not true. It was like I'm dreaming.

In dreams, someone can't really feel emotions at that time of moment but they do exist in some way and are perceived differently. I can't really explain that feeling I have and I might be wrong. I don't even remember a single dream. Only nightmares— or memories.

The last memory that was recorded in me was the feeling of a cold sword, piercing me in the stomach that was held painfully against my burning organs. The taste of blood that lingered warmth and the eyes that stared upon the barren body of someone I knew.

Grey.

At first, I remembered every bad memory of him, that was my way to being angry in this dreamy state. But in an instant, memories rushed to me and I remembered my reasoning for letting myself be killed. It was like there were holes in my mind, emotions, and memories. And the moment that I noticed that something wasn't right, the holes were fixed.

I wanted to write it down, every memory I had, but then I realized I had nothing. No pen to write. No book that I could write on. And no hands to use a pen.

The absence of my body didn't shock me really. I knew that it was there, existing somewhere. May it be in the ground or scientists trying to uncover the secrets of my giant ki-pool, it doesn't matter much. It existed.

However, that didn't give me comfort. I want to do a lot of things. Some of them are childish, and some of them are dumb. I want to breathe, forcing every breath I take till I die. I want to look with my eyes. I want to touch something with my fingers. I want the feeling of my body doing day-to-day activities. I want to feel pain. I want to feel the warmth of helping someone. I want to love something or someone. I want to be free.