Subterranean | H.S.

S38

Harry's pov

''Fuck!''

I grab the steering wheel with all force that I have and hit it, honking right after. 

''Fuck, fuck fuck!'' 

I place my hands over my head and scream into them. 

I clench my jaw, angry with the whole situation, with her and with myself.

I can't believe I'm that stupid. Of course, she wants to be with him. Of course, she's going to tell him. Of course, it was all just a stupid fucking act. That's all she is, an actress. There's only one, real true self in her and it's the one that he created. The one that's scared, afraid of everything, that's never going to stand up for herself. Why would I think something different? Maybe because she was acting super weird after she kissed me by accident. Doing it on purpose is a different thing, but I guess it's even less in her eyes. I can't even believe I let her play with me like that. 

Instead of driving off, like I'd usually do I step out of the car and lock it. My fingers fix the hair on top of my head, stepping into the busy club. 

The music is loud, but it's not annoying me like it usually does. This club is one of the few in the city that's actually playing good music so I don't mind it.

Some girls bump into me, acting like it's all an accident but I'm not in the mood. Tonight is not the night. I give them a death stare and just walk deeper into the club, going to the small bar area. 

I don't see her anywhere, but I don't care. I'm not here for her specifically. I'm not looking for her. I don't want to see her right after what she just did.

I was nice, wasn't I?

I was being polite, I wanted to be a good friend or whatever, make her feel better. I know shit about how to talk to girls about how they feel. I've never had a chance to do so. But I was trying for fuck's sake.

What do I want? 

The only right fucking thing to do. To get rid of the fucker. She doesn't know half of the things I know about him. We go way back and I don't like him even a bit, I never did. She'll be disappointed to know he's doing way worse things than she'll ever think about. Kissing someone just because you want to feel close after being put into a position where you're surrounded by someone like him is not a big deal. But she doesn't know and he's never going to tell her. Me on the other hand? I don't know. I might use it to make her leave him, but I don't want to force it on her. This is her decision and I can't make it sound like it's obvious. 

I can't even process how hurtful it is for me to hear her say that the worst-case scenario for her is to have sex with me. Oh, darling. The things you don't know. 

I smell weed and I know that I'm in the right place. Before I go and sit by the right table I order myself a drink. I tap the floor with my food, waiting for it to be prepared. After that, I take the glass with me and go straight for the couches that are separated from the whole space. 

I almost hit a waitress, not looking where I'm going. I apologize to her and let her go. I sit myself on the couch, leaning to rest my back over the red material, in front of Zayn. He looks flawless, as always. Dressed in all back, looking formal as fuck, but it's hot, I'm not going to lie.

''Oh, so she's here.'' He puffs the smoke through his mouth and I drink some of the alcohol from my glass. ''Good to see you. It's been a while.'' He smiles at me and I put my finger against my lips. ''Quiet, aren't we? What's on your mind?''

I roll my eyes at him and he passes me the joint. I take it from him a take a long drag from it.

''Pissing me off.'' I admit, exhaling. ''She's being too inquisitive.'' I take another drag and after that, I give him back the joint. ''Things are getting harder than I expected them to be.''

''What now?'' He puts the joint between his lips and plays with his glass, sliding it from hand to hand on the table.

''She knows I know.'' I admit, annoyed. ''And she's pissed at me 'cause it slipped from my fucking tongue.''

''About the boyfriend?'' The corner of his lips curls up as I nod my head. ''Fucked that one Harry.'' He laughs at me and I smile at his laugh. ''Told you it was a stupid fucking idea. Niall told you it was a stupid idea. You should just leave it all to me.'' He repeats the words. ''When you play with fire the flame's gonna burn you too.'' 

''I know, I know.'' I drink the rest of my drink in one swing. ''I'm too sober to have this conversation with you. You're the execution of the idea that Niall didn't agree with.'' 

''I know.''

Zayn whistles and calls the waitress. A small brunette comes to us with a smile on her face and orders us drinks.

''I'm driving.'' I laugh at him. ''I can't have that much.'' I push the empty glass away from myself.

''More for me I guess.'' He takes a cigarette from behind his ear and lights it. He observes me observing him lighting the cigarette. ''You like her, don't you?'' 

I stare at him, pouting my lips.

Do I?

''Niall told me about it.'' Zayn laughs, wetting his lips. 

''Niall knows shit.'' I put my arms over the couch.

''But you do like her.'' He repeats himself. ''Driving her here and there, making me watch her after all this time. There's no need to do that, the girl's not a liar. By now you just want to make sure that she's safe. Which she obviously is, with me.'' He puts his hands up in the air. ''I'm just a nice friend from the club.'' 

I know he's right. I won't disagree.

''You tell me that it's unnecessary?'' I furrow my brows and point my finger at him. ''That scumbag almost choked her to death. The security's bad at doing the job so I have to take care of it myself. You know I can take care of myself. God knows what's going on behind the closed door, but at least here she's safe.'' 

The waitress brings us the drinks. Zayn pays for them and I take one of them, taking a sip. He thanks her while I don't even look at her. I'm done with women for tonight.

''Maybe you're right. I mean, I don't mind spending all my days here, watching people that are worth watching instead of sitting at work and doing Niall's job.'' I snort at his words.

''Don't even tell me. Niall's not the one for work as a spy or any other shit like that. He'd come up to her and tell her everything the first day.'' I look to the left and see the dancefloor. ''She told me you two danced.'' I begin the new topic.

I look at him. He nods his head, drinking. ''What about it? Jealous?'' 

''Don't call me jealous when I'm the one having her on me, pressing against my dick.'' I say a little bit too aggressively, obviously not feeling okay with imagining Zayn dancing with her.

''Isn't she with that guy?'' He narrows his brows and leans forward. ''She doesn't seem like the cheating type.''

''She didn't cheat on him, not in my opinion. But she still wants to be with him.'' I shrug my shoulders. ''Everything happened because she made the first move, but it's still not enough for her.''

''She's still clueless? Poor thing.'' He shakes his head, observing someone walking by. ''Give her some time, she's traumatized. Imagine you come home every day or night to a guy who you're not enough for. He's fucked in the head. Told you to get rid of him. A little bit more of those meds and he'll be out and everyone will think that he overdosed. It's not that fucking hard, Harry. You've done it all before.''

I shake my head, not agreeing with him. ''I can't do that to her. She's been through enough.'' 

''Aww, how cute. He cares.'' He laughs at me and I push the glass away from my hand. 

''Shut the fuck up. Let's get to business. Niall got something and I need your help with it.''

//

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