Subterranean | H.S.

S35

Persephone's pov

Even if it did feel nice to get all those thoughts out of my head I'm getting more and more worried the more time goes by. The further away I was from my place, the more anxious I was. Happiness and a smile disappeared from my face and were replaced by worry and more and more thoughts. 

I started overthinking everything I let out and called myself stupid so many times. I let him and the moment broke me and everything spilled.

What am I so worried about? There's so much of that I know and so many of those things I'm unable to even name. There's just such a bad feeling in general when I think about returning to him.

I'm scared that he's going to follow me, hurt me or hurt Riley. As much as I said that whatever he does will have consequences, he's not going to listen, and I'm aware of that. I don't have power over him. I'm scared that he'll get even madder after I come home and he'll force me into something to prove his point. The last and worst-case scenario I think about is him hurting himself to make me stay. That'd be psychotic and fucked up in every way possible, but at this point, I think he's capable of it.

That was pretty much the first time I've ever stood up for myself. It felt so nice. I felt relieved. And it hurts me to come to understand that maybe getting away from him is the way of feeling safe again.

But here nothing's going to happen to me. The hospital has security all over and there's no way he's going to find me in here. This place is like a labyrinth if you don't know the corridors and floors. He's never listened to me talking about Arnie so there's no way of finding me like that either.

With my bags on my shoulders, I open door to Arnie's room, and there he is, sitting on the floor with his back to me. 

I get excited over the things that are coming. Everything's going well, according to my plan and I just have to get the last two things done. I hope there'll be no complications and after that, I'm going to be the happiest person alive.

He doesn't hear me entering the room so I knock on the door to let him know that I'm here. I feel like even if he's a six-year-old kid he still deserves to have his private space, especially now. His boundaries were violated heavily and he needs some time to have time to process everything. 

I smile from ear to ear when I see him turning around to look at me. I notice that there's some kind of book on the floor, between his legs, next to his currently favorite dinosaur. 

''Hi.'' I look back at his face and his face instantly lights up and he smiles, standing from the floor. His little feet lead him towards me, running into my arms. 

He runs into me as I crouch. He wraps his arms around my neck and pushes his face to my face, giggling. 

He smells like his shampoo and freshly washed clothes and I smile to myself, happy that he's here. He's here and I get to hug him and spend time with him. 

I want to tell him, but I can't. Not yet. I have to make sure that he's ready.

''Hi Phee.'' He nuzzles even more into my neck. I move my hand up and down his back in slow motion. After a moment he moves away and holds his hands in front of himself, smiling at me and I furrow my brows at him.

''What are you up to?'' He doesn't answer, instead, he takes my hand and leads me to the spot he was sitting on. 

I notice a thick book. It's new, it definitely is. 

He hands me the book, letting go of my hand. I glance at him before taking it into my hands. 

The book is pretty, but it looks expensive. It's a little bit too complicated for a boy like him in my opinion, but the most important is for him to like it. It's a book about dinosaurs, of course. There're drawing inside with descriptions of every dinosaur and little history and stories attached to each. At the end, there're stickers and exercises to do to keep the owner busy. Some pages have those 3D-like elements that form plants and dinosaurs into actual figures and it's so cool I even want it. Some elements can be lifted. 

''This is nice, right?'' I look at him, closing the book after flipping the paged for so long. He nods his head, smiling. ''That's nice of your parents to get you something like this.'' I give it back to him and he takes it from me. ''They visited you today, that's kind of them.'' I admit after seeing their names put into the system as visitors.

I put my bags on the floor and unzip one of them to take something out.

''It wasn't mommy or daddy.'' He speaks and I nod my head, connecting the dots. 

''Well, it's nice of the doctors and nurses then.'' You deserve it after being treated like a wild fucking animal. I hope you got the best apologies. I take the hat out of my bag and turn to give it to him, but at the same time, he speaks.

''No Phee, it was your friend.'' My fingers play with the strap on the back of the hat as I get more confused. 

Why the fuck would Riley come here? The last time she was here Arnie was asleep and we fought. Was it because she felt bad about all of that happening while he was asleep? It makes completely no sense, but she's a weirdo. He prob-

Wait.

I open my mouth as it clicks in my head and I look at Arnie. 

She's never met him, she never spoke to him. He doesn't know her. 

So it means it must be...

''Harry?'' I ask him, not believing he was here. 

The little boy nods his head and I sit on the bed before I collapse to the floor. 

Harry was here. He was here again and he saw Arnie, they talked. He came here to comfort him in a way that's comforting for him. He came here after buying Arnie a book about animals that he's absolutely obsessed with. He didn't hurt him, he's never done that because those are not his intentions. He took him time to get him something and make him feel better.

It warms my heart and I smile to myself. He's unbelievable.

It means that he knows that something's going on. And I don't know if it's just from the call that I got. I looked like pure panic, but was it as obvious? I think I looked just fine after walking out of the hospital. Does that mean that he knows more than I think he does? But how would he know that? There's no way. I have to stop connecting everything to Jack and him lying to me. Not everyone is like him, not Harry.

''Phee?'' Arnie stops my inner monologue and I come back to him.

''Yes?''

''Is this for me?'' He points to the hat and I answer with a quiet 'yes'. 

''Here, put it on. You're gonna need it.'' I hand him the hat in the shape of a dinosaur and he takes it from me and puts it on immediately, thanking me.

''For what?'' He asks, adjusting it on his little head.

''We're going out for a little while. For you to get some Sun. You've been stuck here forever.'' He jumps, excited. I knew that it was a good idea. ''The hat's supposed to protect your head from overheating. I have one for me as well.''

''Where are we going?'' He takes my hand, ready to go and I giggle.

''We'll go to the inner courtyard where I have some games for you and we'll spend the whole day together.''

//

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