Choices (Book Four)

Chapter 18

Shawn

I slowly blink my eyes open, feeling groggy and thirsty as hell. I glance down the hospital bed and see my leg all bandaged and propped up. Right, that did really happen and wasn't just a horrible dream. I shift on the bed to try and reposition myself and wince when I end up moving my leg a bit. Fuck that hurts. I drop my head back into the pillow and close my eyes again, willing my tears to not start falling.

"Hey bud," my dad's voice from beside me surprises me as I turn to see him sitting in the chair next to my bed.

He looks exhausted and uncomfortable as he leans forward in the chair, resting his elbows on his knees. The blinds are closed over the window but I can see some sun peeking through. I really have no clue what time it is, not that it matters either.

"How you feelin'?" He asks me.

"Like shit," I groan out, my voice groggy.

My dad stands from his chair and retrieves me a cup of water. I finish the whole thing in a couple swigs. My dad takes the empty cup back from me and places it on the bedside table before he sits back in his chair.

"I hear you had an unexpected visitor yesterday," my dad comments.

I know he's referring to Lyla and I don't feel in the mood to talk about her right now. When she walked into the room last night I was surprised but couldn't deny a part of me was happy to see her. The sight of her always brings a sense of calmness over me. But soon that calmness was replaced with anger and annoyance as I reminded myself that she has a boyfriend. Still. That I kissed her four weeks ago and she left me standing on the street. That I haven't heard from her since that night, and now she's shown up here in my hospital room. A foolish side of me had hoped she would have broken up with Will that night four weeks ago. That kissing me would have reminded her of what we had and what we could have again. That she would have called me later that night, told me it was over with him and meet me wherever she wanted in town so that I could kiss her again.

But that call never came and from checking out Instagram, Will had posted yet another picture of them together just a few days ago. Guess she didn't tell him about the kiss. I truly didn't want to tell her to leave last night, but I knew that it was best for me. I couldn't keep putting myself through this one sided fight for us when she wasn't giving me any signs she wanted anything to do with me anymore. Plus I didn't want her around to see me like this. I don't want anyone's pity right now.

"Yes I did," I answer my dad finally.

"How did that go?"

"Not great" I admit. I've always been able to be honest with my dad, there's no point in trying to hide things because he knows me and calls my bluff.

"Sorry to hear that son," he says sincerely and I nod along in agreement. "I really wish you two could have worked it out, anyone could see you were both crazy about each other."

"We were," I agree with him. "I just don't know if she still is. I am but I don't know how much longer I can keep putting my heart out on the line when she keeps shutting me down."

"I hear you son," he says softly. "I can't tell you what to do, only you know what is going to be your decision. But I will say that if this love is the real deal, and only you will know that, then it is worth fighting for trust me. You can't let anything stand in the way because as much as it might hurt to have your heart broken over and over again, the pain of regret you will feel if you don't go after it will last a lifetime longer."

I sigh as I process his words in my mind.

"Way to drop the wisdom on me while I'm looped out on painkillers dad," I tease him lightening the mood and he chuckles softly.