Becoming his (Bucky x yn x Steve)

07. Heart to heart

"Buck. You alright?" Steve asked, laying a hand on to Bucky's shoulder as Bucky wiped his face with his shirt.

"Yeah." Bucky replied. "Yeah I'm fine. But she's not."

"It's not your fault Buck." Steve looked at him sadly. "We'll get out of this, and we'll get out of it together."

Although Steve was trying his best to comfort Bucky, he can't help but think that if they were tougher, or if they could escape and save her, then none of this would happen. His survivor's guilt from before kicks in, maximising his guilt even more. He stands up and drags Bucky along with him, they walked to the table where the food yn had brought in morning was still left out on the table.

"Eat something." Steve said, taking a banana himself. "We need to stay up if we want to get out."

Bucky looked at the food hesitantly, but then took one in the end.

"Buck, did you know her before or not?" Steve asked, for the nth time at this point.

"Yeah." Bucky replied. "There were times, when I'd just came back from my...erm...missions, and before I get frozen again, I'd be free of mind control. We used to talk to each other as Hydra agents, she didn't know I was free of mind control."

"But then why did she attack?"

"I don't know." Bucky replied, thinking back to yn's cold, unrecognising looks, her ruthless attacks when she took them and her attitude which all suggested she doesn't have a clue who he is. "She was in the red room remember? And the chemicals Nat told you about. We probably have to just find that."

Then they looked at each other and signed. If only it was that easy. Hydra would never just leave these chemicals laying around in the middle of the nowhere, unhidden and easy to snatch from. It must be somewhere secure, somewhere locked up and needing authorisation.

Both men stared into the space, pondering over this thought.

"Buck do you think she's know where these chemicals are kept?" Steve suddenly asked.

"What chemicals?"

"The one's to free yn of mind control, the ones we're talking about just." Steve replied. Only to realise that the owner of the voice was not his pal.

Both heads turned at once towards to door to discover that yn had returned, clutching on to a medical box. "Please be ready, I will check your injuries and ensure they're okay."

Then she walked in and began setting out the equipment, but was immediately stopped by the two men.

"Yn are you okay?" Bucky asked immediately, holding on to her arm and carefully setting her onto the sofa.

"Did you get too hurt?" Steve asked as he used his unbroken hand to take out all the medical equipments and checking to see if any of them were useful for fixing a broken rib.

"No I am okay." Yn said, lying to them. "Please sit back, I'm supposed to-"

"No yn." Steve cut her off, looking into her eyes seriously. "Your injured, we heard. You broke a rib. You're the last person who should be walking and tending to us."

"So sit back and let us make sure you're okay." Bucky continued.

Yn looked confused for a second, but then she felt a warm flow through her body. The two men looked for all the equipment and checked thoroughly in the box, but then both blushed as they held the equipment in their hands, realising that they can't exactly just lift up yn's shirt and check her injuries. And Yn, for the first time in a while, smiled at their red faces. "I'm fine." She repeated again.

"Yn, you're far beyond fine." Bucky signed, putting down the equipment again. "You're being tortured by him yn! He's making you do these things you don't want todo by mind controlling you, that's just-"

"Excuse me?" Yn asked, then she noticed Steve give Bucky a little shake of head, telling him not to tell her any more. "No steve, what's happening?"

Steve and Buck exchanged a look, then Steve coughed a little and spoke uncertainly. "Yn, Zola's mind controlling you to do things. They erm...injected chemicals in your body to ensure that you're following their instructions."

Yn stayed still upon hearing his words, mentally connecting all the dots. That's why every time some emotions come up there's something suppressing them, that's why they always checked her brain status and letting out a sign of relieve when everything appears to be fine. And that's why Zola always looks at her suspiciously every time something he doesn't expect happens. Because they're scared that the mind control would stop working. Suddenly, everything clicks to her.

"I'm being mind controlled." She said calmly in acknowledgement. "I'm being mind controlled like the previous Black Widows."

Steve tilted his head slightly and looked at her, slightly surprised at the girl's calm reaction. "Yn, you okay?"

"Yes I'm okay." Yn replied. "So these were the chemicals you two were talking about when I entered the room."

"Yeah." Bucky replied, taking one of yn's hands into his. "Yn, do you have any ideas where they'd have kept the antidote for the chemical they used for the widows?"

Yn looked at Bucky and looked down at her hand, when she looked up again, Bucky had looked slightly away, his face going a bit red. "The same chemicals wouldn't release work because the widows didn't get to think like i can, so this is different."

"Yes, how could we forget." Steve said suddenly, standing up too quickly and getting a bit dizzy. When he readjusted his balance, he continued speaking out his thread of thoughts. "Yn can think freely, but she just follows the instructions and doesn't really feel much. That's more like....getting rid of emotions and forcing her to....comply? I don't know a technical word for that."

"Emotion suppression and forced submission." Yn replied, thinking carefully.

Steve signed. "I can't imagine what would cure that."

"I think that a cure's not what I need." Yn said, making two pairs of eyes turn on her. "I've already been faking my brain neurone activity to the doctors."

" Then I think it's not a controlling situation, it's a suppressing situation." Bucky said, deep in thought.

"So what's needed isn't a cure to get out of being controlled." Steve continued.

"It's to let you feel these feelings freely and express them the way you should." Bucky finished. "That makes sense. When have you started lying to the doctors?"

"A few days ago." Yn replied.

"So when you first met us?" Steve asked, feeling kind of curious to where this leads.

"Well," Bucky replied, smiling a bit. "The timeline does seem to match up."