Journey To The Half Of My Deen

Chapter Twenty-Six

LAIBA P.O.V

I felt angry, really angry. this guy had the nerve to judge me and come at me then he goes to my father and brother to ask my hand in marriage. Who does he think he is?

I only thought of him as a friend when we were kids and nothing more than that. So now thinking of him as my husband is a huge NO. I knew my answer to give my parents, I was not going to entertain this idea. It is funny because I did consider him before I met Hamad. Now I know I only feel for Hamad, I did not understand it but I now know what I felt for Hamad.

I walked into the kitchen, I saw them all smiling and excited as if I had already said yes. I felt like throwing up but I held my emotions in and did not say anything.

My mother looked at me with those happy and hopeful eyes, I felt bad knowing I will make her sad by saying No to Zeeshan but I was not going to agree marrying him anytime soon or ever for that matter.

I looked at Halimah and she knew I heard the news already and she seemed concerned. I looked at mom "Mama can I go to Ranias?" I asked hopeful, knowing I was sick they would never agree. She frowned "Laiba you are not well, just have a rest I will ask your brother to drop you at her place tomorrow" I groaned before going back to my room. I left the kitchen in anger. (A/N: it is wrong to make any form of noise of disrespect towards your parent so do not do that and if you do then make Istighfar) 

I am not someone who gets angry easily so for me to get angry and barge out the kitchen like that I am sure my family will know something is up with me.

I walked into my room, I wanted to go to the treehouse but the memories of me and Zeeshan will make me overwhelmed and right now I was already feeling my anxiety kicking in.

I did wudhu before I stood up to pray two Rakaats asking Allah for guidance. After praying I felt so relaxed, I felt like all of my worries of this world had disappeared into thin air. My anger was gone too.

I sat on the prayer mat and just kept making dua to Allah. I heard a knock before the door of my room door opened. I knew without looking behind that was my sister, Ya Allah what would I do without her being in my life?

She sat next to me, I put my head on her shoulder. No words were uttered the next few minutes, the silence was calming and peaceful although it felt like calmness before the storm. Ya Allah please don't let there be any storms anymore.

Halimah took a deep breath before speaking "Laiba I know you heard about the hand in marriage" I sat straight looking down at my hands before nodding

"You can say No, do not let mom or dad pressure you into saying Yes" she made me look up at her before I smiled with tears in my eyes. "Laiba although I will suggest that you do not make a decision without having a valid reason before you say No, I know you won't make a wrong decision but please do not make a decision in haste" she looked at me concerned and I nodded understanding what she meant.

I stayed silent, I felt calm even though I knew if I had not prayed, I would have crumbled. I knew what happened with Zeeshan really shook me, for any other person it would have not mattered but to me it really bothered me. I felt scared that what if he did something to me at that moment out of anger and I had no one with me.

I looked at my sister and I told her everything that happened with Zeeshan. She looked so surprised and angry, but I sighed feeling a little better letting it out. I waited for her response because every time she spoke, I felt better in every way.

"Laiba, you have to understand that he could have done something wrong to you, but did he?" I shook my head "what he did was not right, but did he touch or do anything inappropriate?" I shook my head "He judged you, but he also cleared his doubts by talking it out with you, maybe not in a right manner but he confronted you" she said

"By blaming and accusing me" I said with anger

"Yes, but he confronted you, because honestly anyone would see you with a man alone and they would think the exact same thing, If I saw you alone with Hamad, I would think the exact same thing without coming to reason. Remember what I told you when I saw you with Zeeshan?" I nodded listening to everything and understanding what she was explaining

"If it was anyone else, like our elders of the family you would be in big trouble because people would start telling lies about you and people would not believe you to be in the right or they would not give you a chance to explain the truth, they would assume the wrong"

"What I would advise is that do not put yourself in that position ever again" she said to me sternly and I nodded feeling fear in my heart

"he was angry because he feels something towards you, he has feelings for you and when he realized you did nothing wrong he knew he did not want to lose you to someone else that is why he asked for your hand in marriage without wasting anymore time" she gave me a different point of view and I felt bad for judging him, I was angry for him judging me but I was no better, I did not see his side before making a decision.

I decided to give him a chance before making any decision, I will do Istikhara for Hamad and for Zeeshan and ask Allah to truly guide me on what was best for me. 

{A/N: Assalamu Alaikum! i hope you are all in good health by Allah Ta'alas will, please let me know how you are finding this book so far, Jazakumullahu Khayran for all those that support me.  

This chapter is dedicated to My Sweet and Loyal Reader @anabiya_vayani6 Jazakillahu Khayran for your support ❤ .}