Simon the Homeless

the idea

Simon and Gaspard were orphans now because their parents abandoned them because they were sick of Simon's bs. They left the house and moved to Antarctica, and now they were officially Home Alone™

even though Gaspard was like, three years old and didn't even do anything

"you know what" Simon said

"ye ah?" Gaspard said orphanly.

"We should go to the mall, so we can get kidnapped and have a new family!1!1!" Simon said stupidly. He was always stupid

"B-B-B-But Simon I don't wánt to" Gaspard said, and then started making out with his blanket epicly

"GIVE ME THAT" Simon said. He was very pissed. So pissed that he pissed on Gaspard. And he took his Gaspard's blankie™ and threw it into the oven. The house exploded and everyone died.

Except, nobody died. How?!?!?!111!?!

The house was nothing but ash........ and then Simon and Gaspard became black.

Because they were covered in ash, stop bringing race into everything /j /j /j /j /j /j 🙄💅😭😠

"Awwwww now our house is burned down" Simon said sadly.... and... madly.

"This is your fault gas PARD" he said British™ly. "If it weren't for you we would still have our house"

"no u" Gaspard said

Then, Simon proceeded to Thanos snap out of existence because of Gaspard's ultimate roast.

"G-G-Gaspard I-I-I-I don't feel so g-g-g-good" he said before evaporating

But then he was reincarnated in the neighbor's yard

"aY git ofF my yOrD yOu black robbit" the old man shouted from his window, that was made of dead children

"That's kinda racist ngl" Simon speeched

He wipped the ash off of himself to show that he was... white

what a plot twist, never saw that one coming 😱

"nvm" he said, and went back to eating an infant

"Let's go to the mall and commit arson!1!1!" Simon said excitedly. He nearly shook Gaspard to death to get the ash off of him. He went unconscious

"Guess I'll have to drag him" Simon said, and dragged his unconscious brother to the mall to commit... arson.

p a R T t w O c O m i n G s o O N t o A s T O R e n E a r y O u